Aaron & Jackson: Their Journey ReWritten
by Dayne Dinning
Summary: Aaron wakes up in hospital, and finds the vague, fading events of 'The Day You Never Expect To Arrive' never happened. Jackson and Aaron's first meeting and their relationship is different from what is shown on the show.
1. 1 It Was Only Just A Dream

"It Was Only Just A Dream"

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

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><p>The machine beeps around him were the first thing he heard, and the brightness of the room made him want to close his eyes again. <em>That was a strange dream; it was so real, am I ok? <em>He thought to himself, then the memories of why he was here came back to him and he heard his mother and Paddy closing in on the room, Chas talking rather loudly. His head was pounding from the residual effects from the smoke but he lifted it up, absolutely amazed to hear her voice, and to see her alive through the window. Some details of the dream were missing but he remembered someone –J? He sighed and gave up. It was just his mind playing tricks.

"I don't care if he's gay Paddy, I think it's bloody fantastic if you ask me but this is one thing I'm not going to be blamed for alright! That's the way he is, he has to live with that!" she exclaimed.

Aaron shook his head slowly and closed his eyes, waiting – just waiting for them to come in. Aaron sat up and readjusted himself and turned on his side, bringing the bed quilt right up over his shoulders and almost as if tucking it into his neck.

The next few hours brought on a brutal verbal assault from his mum, visits from Adam, talks with Paddy. He and Adam had dealt with the issue of the kiss. Looking back it was quite funny but this was just the beginning of the adjustment period for Aaron.

But the closest around him were fearful that it might lead to yet more tears.

It took a few days but Aaron was finally released from hospital. The more he thought about it the more he realised he wasn't gay, but then it was a catch twenty two situation, why did he attempt suicide? It baffled him, his head was a mess. His mood leading up to it all was dark, isolated, lonely - the feelings inside his head battled with what he assumed was normal.

No one knew why until Adam told Chas and Paddy about Aaron trying to kiss him. It all added up from that point forward, all they needed now was Aaron to admit he was. Not that it was an issue that should be forced; Aaron had to sort this through himself.

Aaron sat on the grass outside smithy, he'd been told to take it easy because it would take his breathing a while to return to normal.

He looked down the village, it was just normal. The people would probably still carry on like normal if he'd have succeeded which in his mind at that moment he'd wished he'd had but no, Adam had to find him didn't he.

Aaron climbed to his feet. He wanted some chocolate, so he set on his way down the village to Viv's. As he walked in Bob greeted him. "Well look who it is"

Aaron gave a sarcastic smile before grabbing a bottle of diet coke, a bag of ready salted and a few chocolate bars. He placed them on the counter. "Someone's hungry" Bob laughed as he tapped the prices into the till.

"Oh trust me, I could eat a horse" he said sarcastically. "But with my cooking, I'd rather not bother attempting" he smiled.

Bob nodded. "There is the cafe you know..."

Aaron shook his head. "Nahh, too many people for my liking right now..."

"I understand...That'll be two seventy nine then please"

Aaron searched his pockets and pulled out a fiver. He got his change, stuffed the chocolate bars into his pocket and grabbed the drink and crisps and headed out. "Cheers Bob"

When he exited the shop, the person he dreaded to see the most was only a few metres away. "Hey, what you doing out?"Chas asked.

Aaron sighed. "I can't sit in there all day can I? And anyway, fresh air is good for me right now, so don't complain" he scowled at her.

"Oh alright, I'll let you off this time, Is Paddy looking after you alright?"

Aaron sighed.

"I'm just asking Aaron"

"Well don't, you know he is, he's worse than you, and plus I know it's you ringing the house to check on me"

"Guilty as charged" Chas sighed. "I just care Aaron, Oh but listen, we have new neighbours, well not literally neighbours but you know what I mean"

"Yeah?" Aaron frowned. "And?" he asked.

"Well if you catch my drift...if I was a few years younger, wow I would" she smirked at him.

Aaron shook his head. "Mumm..." he complained.

Chas laughed. "See ya later kid" she said before walking into the shop herself.

"Mum!" the voice caught Aaron's attention from further down the road, at Dale head. A lad probably just a little bit older than Aaron, but not by much was stood holding a unit, on the doorstep.

They were the new neighbours. Aaron walked closer out of curiosity.

"Just leave the TV in the doorway, I mean come on, it's not that heavy to drag a few more metres into the living room" the man laughed.

"Oh shut up you!" Aaron heard the voice of a woman with a southern accent. "You give me earache you do, get in here with that before you break it"

Aaron smirked and the lad turned around seeing Aaron watching and he lost his balance and the unit he was carrying almost fell to the floor before he regained hold of it properly.

Aaron cleared his throat and jumped back to reality; he quickly looked around and walked back up to the house.

"Oh Jackson, be more careful will ya? Come on get in here..." his mother spoke.

"Yeah...yeah" his tone distracted as he watched him walk away. _Wow _was his instant reaction.

"What'cha staring at?"

Jackson frowned and looked back into the house at his mum. "Nothing, just trying to get a feel of the place"

"Oh right then, get in here we've got unpacking to do, oh the joys...I know, don't bother complaining" she smiled lovingly as Jackson walked in the house and closed the door behind him.

He was going to like it here.

Aaron looked down at the house from the front door of the cottage. _Hmmm _the confusion built even more so, he didn't know what had just happened and he didn't know how to explain the feelings that accompanied it.

To Be Continued...

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><p>Hope You guys continue to read these, and review them! Hope you like what I've done here!<p> 


	2. 2 Knew It All Along

"Knew It All Along"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _It Was Only Just A Dream_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Aaron was stood looking out of the bedroom window topless, one of his arms was up resting against the window frame - it wasn't a very nice day, quite windy, and cloudy - he could see a few cars queued up outside the garage. "Right that's it I'm not staying here all day" he told himself and with that he took out his overalls and got dressed.

The front door slamming a few minutes later caught Paddy's attention and he ran to the door and opened it – Aaron was walking down into the village. "Hey you've been told to rest Aaron!" he called after him.

Aaron turned his head slightly but not fully. "Yeah well I'm choosing not too" he grinned sarcastically as he carried on walking with his hands in his pockets.

Paddy sighed, shook his head and closed the door.

"I can't talk right now Aaron, I'm a little busy" Cain looked up from under a cars bonnet.

"Yeah I know, that's why I've come to help"

Cain laughed dismissively. "Yeah well you can forget that mate"

"Oh come on, you'll lose business if you don't get these done and if I remember rightly you've gotta nip into town today for parts...I saw it in the diary last week, I can cover, it's better than no work being done cause you've had to go off, Cain – please I'm going mental in there"

Cain watched him, and then sighed. "Alright, but one, don't push yourself two, any problems just ring and as always make you sure you get the money for these, I remember what happened last time"

Aaron's face lit up. "I will, I will" then his brow burrowed. "Now, that was a one off" he explained.

Cain walked towards him and before he even passed him he threw his spanner at him and Aaron caught it. "Good catch, the details for the cars are on the desk"

Aaron nodded and smiled widely and walked up into the office, checked the info and looked at the car Cain was working on. It looked like he wasn't far off. "No problem" he sighed happily and carried on what Cain was doing.

An hour later, the owner had came for the car he finished first, then the owner for the second car came when he was just placing the final tyre on the car, as he was taking payment, a blue van pulled into the courtyard, Aaron looked up as the owner of the van got out. He was almost immediately breathless at the sight of him.

"Yeah mate no probs..." he replied to the man he was dealing with at that moment as he was writing out an invoice. He tore it off and handed it to him. The man got in his car and drove away.

"I'll be with you in a sec" Aaron told him, he avoided eye contact as he walked off and picked up two of the tyres and placed them inside the garage, then walked out and picked up the other two.

Jackson was looking at him with a smirk as he leaned against the bonnet of his van. _Ooo I don't mind _Jackson instantly knew it was the lad who was staring at him yesterday. As the mechanic walked over, Jackson stopped his perverted thoughts and stood straight.

"Right then" Aaron had to make eye contact now. "What seems to be the problem?" he asked.

"It keeps stalling, and something seems wrong with the electrics" Jackson was literally clueless.

Aaron frowned, trying to think. "You checked the fuses?" he asked.

Jackson laughed. "Nah mate I'm a builder not a mechanic"

Aaron laughed aswell but felt strange momentarily as dizziness overcome him and he almost fell against the van.

Jackson instinctively grabbed him by both hands to steady him, he looked worried. "You alright mate?"

Aaron hung his head, taking deep breaths. "Yeah just give me a sec" he breathed.

Jackson looked around for anyone to help but that didn't really work there was no one around. "Go back in the garage, take a break – I'm not working today so I don't need the van till tomorrow"

"No, I can't – I think I'll just sit here" he lowered himself down onto gravel and rested his head against the registration plate. Aaron then realised the lads hold on him and forced him off him.

"Sorry..." he replied. "Is this something that happens often or, has something happened?"

"No I tried to kill myself; carbon monoxide poisoning, I work in the best place, took the opportunity, and couldn't even get that right" Aaron chuckled. "Nothing better than honesty is there"

Jackson frowned. "I guess not, what made you wanna try?" he asked.

"I crossed a line, and some people wouldn't let me forget, I couldn't take it anymore"

"Oh, okay" this wasn't really Jackson's place.

"Just go I'll sort your van; you don't wanna be hanging around here on your day off"

"No I can't leave you in this state" Jackson replied.

"Look just go, I'll be alright – I always am" Aaron snapped.

"Okay, okay if you say so" Jackson took out a business card and handed it to him as he stood. "Gimme a call when it's ready" He walked away.

The afternoon soon flew by; it was five in the blink of an eye. Well that's what it felt like to Aaron. He left the garage, with a few oil marks on his face, his hands covered. When he rounded the corner he knocked on the new arrivals door. And a woman answered. Aaron double checked the card. "Hi, is Jackson here?" he asked with a friendly smile.

"Oh yeah, the van...I told him to get shot of it from day one, bleedin' thing, it's nothing but bother...I'll just get him for you, he's probably upstairs getting ready"

"No no, no need just tell him Aaron says his vans ready and if he just pops round tomorrow he can pay and pick it up" Aaron told her.

Hazel smiled and nodded. "I'll do that Aaron, thanks"

Aaron smiled. "Alright then, goodnight" he chuckled slightly as he walked away.

When he got home he was greeted by his mum and Paddy. "Oh boy..." he said.

"Too right 'oh boy' what do you think you were doing going to work?" Chas asked abruptly.

"Oh do one will ya, I'm still here aren't I?"

"Yeah just, who knows what could of happened, hey where you going now!" she called after him as he ignored her and ran upstairs.

"Getting changed and then going out alright!"

"No, actually Aaron it's not alright" Chas shouted at him, clearly frustrated, she walked back in the kitchen. "Oh you know what Paddy, I can't do right for doing wrong, if I care, I get this, If I don't care I get this treatment"

"He's a teenager Chas"

"Yeah and don't I bloody well know it...I'm off, see ya" Chas sighed and closed the door on her way out.

Aaron came down, all clean and fresh after his shower, wearing dark jeans and his grey jumper. He straight away left the house without a word to Paddy because he knew if he got a chance to speak to him, he'd try and keep him in the house, and Aaron was having none of that.

Aaron arrived in Hotten a little while later and headed round a few bars but got bored quickly until he found himself wandering down an alley, he came to the other end of it and saw a bar that was quite busy. Bar West – he knew what it was, and he couldn't fight his urge of curiousness. He found himself walking across the road and with each step finding himself closer and closer to the door. He pushed it open and the music was louder, the chatter around him was loud. The majority of the people in were men, some women. He walked up to the bar; he gulped as he settled himself at it and waited to be served. His eyes were cautious, looking around at every opportunity hoping that he wouldn't get caught out. Eventually after impatiently waiting he got his pint and walked over and took a seat at the back wall, next to a doorway. He figured it wasn't the best place to sit but there weren't really any other places.

He was drinking it quickly, he felt like he was being stared at but in fact it was his own apprehension and insecurities that was causing this but he didn't know that.

The door beside him opened and a few men walked it, he didn't realise they were toilets. One of them turned and Aaron looked up at the same time, he was wearing a red chequered shirt. It was Jackson. Aaron's heart raced with panic and he froze as watched the look on Jackson face unfold he instantly understood it.

It all fit together now, the staring, the story of his attempted suicide, the avoidance of eye contact. The look was one that basically said I thought so.

Aaron placed his still half full pint on the table, unshackled himself from his frozen form and bolted up, barging through Jackson and his mates.

Jackson sighed. "Aaron!" he called after him. He got the idea of where Aaron's head was at now.

Once he stepped off the bus, Aaron ran home, firmly shut the door behind him, relaxed. He was safe now. He put on a smile and walked into the kitchen. "See, not late – sorry about earlier" he apologised.

Paddy frowned. "You need to start treating Chas with a little more respect, she's your mum"

Aaron sighed. "Yeah but she really does my head in"

"Well maybe if you took a little more care of yourself and stopped being so careless" he said as he got up and stood beside him.

Aaron sighed. "Okayy"

"So..."Paddy softened and began nudging him with his arm. "Pull any hot girls tonight then?" he asked, he never really read into the whole gay rumours, he always believed in Aaron and what he said.

Aaron sighed and didn't answer, but Paddy kept going, pushing it just that little further.

"No Paddy I didn't" he was short with him.

"Oh come on! You're first night out in ages and you didn't pull" he asked. "Something wrong with you son"

_Yeah and don't I know it _Aaron thought with a sigh. He knew Paddy was only messing around deep down but it penetrated him deeply and the anger rose more and more the longer he stayed in the kitchen. He bolted upstairs without a word, slammed his door shut.

His expression was angry as he walked over and looked at himself in the free standing mirror. His reflection disgusted and with one quick swift movement of his arm; he shattered the glass into pieces with his fists, and punched it over causing a loud crashing noise on top of the glass falling to the floor. His knuckles and fingers were cut deeply and the blood poured from them. When he looked out of the window he saw Jackson walking home and his hands curled into fists once again which caused the blood to seep out more quickly.

His door burst open. "What the hell are you doing Aaron!" Paddy yelled.

To Be Continued...


	3. 3 The Approach

"The Approach"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Knew It All Along_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Aaron woke to the instant pain from his cuts on his hands as he rested up onto his elbows; he instantly smelt bacon rising up from the kitchen. He looked down at his hands and noticed bruises had developed around the cuts aswell. He sighed. _You're mental Livesy _Aaron thought to himself.

Last night was a revelation to say the least. Paddy knew Aarons predicament, but in usual Paddy style and understanding, well yes that's what he did, he understood. He didn't care if Aaron was gay, he just wanted him to be happy and he promised him in his sobbing that he would try to be from now on. That's why today was going to be difficult – he was going to approach Jackson and see how it went from there.

Several minutes later Aaron wandered into the kitchen. "Alright?" Paddy asked.

Aaron nodded and stood at the kettle waiting for it to finish boiling. "Yeah not bad I guess" he frowned. "You?"

"Yeah fine" Paddy smiled. "So...big night last night wasn't it?"

Aaron couldn't help but laugh. "I guess so"

"I'm gunna repeat myself now again, but don't feel weird about it okay? You are who you are and as long you accept that in time and be happy, then that's all that matters to me"

"I know Paddy" Aaron turned to face him. "Thankyou...Are you gunna tell mum?"

"No I think that's your job don't you"

Aaron nodded. "I will when I'm ready but first I'm gunna keep my promise and see Jackson today"

Paddy grinned. "I'm glad, so do you like him?" he asked as he placed some bacon onto some bread for Aaron and put the plate on the table with the sauce ready.

Aaron poured their coffees and sat down at the table with him. He smirked.

"Go on you can tell me"

Aaron laughed.

"Ha! Aaron Livesy going red, I never thought this day would come!"

Aaron sighed as he took a bite of the sandwich. "I like the look of him" the muffled voice replied.

Paddy laughed. "Oh yeah cause talking with ya mouth full is gunna turn him on"

"Oh Paddy!" Aaron laughed and looked away.

Aaron swallowed and cleared his throat. "I said – I like the look of him, he's attractive – I just don't know him yet that's all"

Paddy nodded. "Well you can make a start today then can't you?"

Aaron nodded. "I'll do my best"

Hazel sighed as she entered the living room; the house was coming together a lot more now. She liked it. "Are you gunna lounge around here all day or you actually going to go to work?"

"Self employed mum, nothing important in the diary and anyway I'm dying here, give me some sympathy, go on you know you want too" his deep brown puppy dog eyes looked up at her.

Hazel almost fell for it every time. "I love you son but you're hung-over, you aren't dying at all, once upon a time you could use that excuse on me but not no more" she chuckled. "Boys" she sighed as she opened the curtains much to Jackson's distain.

"Arghh" he moaned and pulled the cushion over his face.

Hazel sat on the single chair. "So, have fun last night?"

"Hmm depends how you define fun, I got wasted, it was at the time, but now it isn't"

"I can see that" she laughed. "Meet any nice boys?"

Jackson surfaced from under the pillow. "As a matter of fact I think I have – but not from last night, I saw him in the village actually but I've hardly spoke to him really except once and to be honest he seems a little - I dunno; conflicted..."

"Meaning?"

"He doesn't seem sure of who he is, but I like the look of him"

"Well get to know him, what's he like? Have I seen him?"

"I'm not sure, the mechanic?"

Hazel's jaw dropped. "Ohh he came round yesterday, said your van was ready, but you left before I could tell you, he is very handsome"

Jackson smirked. "I know" he sat up. "Better get a shower hadn't I? Got a van to pick up"

Hazel shook her head. "That you're excuse now is it?"

Jackson stopped in the doorway before going upstairs, turned to his mother and simply nodded with a wink.

Aaron walked out of the cafe with a coffee in his hand and told himself to go to Dale head and knock on the door. He wasn't looking where he was going and the next thing he knew, his coffee went all over his chest and seeped through his clothes, burning instantly. He winced in pain.

"Oh god! I'm so so sorry" Jackson was very apologetic and tried to rub it off with the sleeve of his jacket.

When Aaron realised who it was he decided to forego the brutal verbal assault he would normally deliver and instead his breath was taken away and not by the burning. "Death by steaming coffee" Aaron instantly rolled his eyes. _How pathetic was that? _He cursed himself.

Jackson looked at him and laughed. "This isn't what I usually do by the way..."

Aaron frowned, trying not to let the hotness from the drink bother him. But it didn't work Jackson could tell, and he felt awful. "What?" Aaron asked.

"Bumping into you so I could talk to you – I mean..." he took a breath, it was like he was turning into a kid who couldn't get his words out when he really liked someone. "I mean I *was* coming to talk to you..."

Aaron smirked. "Jackson – it's fine really...I was coming to talk to you aswell, I wanted to explain last night, I shouldn't have done that, and I made a right fool of myself, Paddy's out if you wanna come back and talk? I just need to get changed..."

Jackson smiled. "Yeah" he nodded. "Sure – lead the way"

Inside Smithy Cottage, Aaron left Jackson in the kitchen while he went upstairs to get changed. His chest was quite red and sore to the touch, but he'd live. He hesitated going back downstairs. _He's actually in the house _the words surprised him. _What the hell do I do now? _He wondered. He stopped for a second, collected his thoughts, took a deep breath and walked down the stairs and into the kitchen where Jackson was sat at the table.

"You ok?" Jackson asked.

Aaron nodded. "Yeah thanks, it's not bad, you're safe"

Jackson let out a breath. "Good – so I'm here, *we're* here now..."

"Yeah..." Aaron sat down beside him. "I told you yesterday that I crossed a line and that's why I attempted to kill myself..."

Jackson nodded.

"I tried kissing my best mate" he sighed. "And ever since I've been so confused, and when I saw you moving in, and saw you, I got the strangest feelings I never experienced them for a man before, well not as intensely as yesterday" his face screwed up as he tried to make sense of it all.

"It's alright Aaron, you don't have too, I mean you hardly know me..."

"No see that's the thing, I think you're attractive, hot..." Aaron blushed. "And I do wanna get to know you, last night was me running away..."

Jackson noticed his hands. "They weren't there last night..."

Aaron sighed. "I smashed my mirror and spent most of the night telling Paddy things I should have talked about months ago"

"You mentioned him, who is he?"

"He's, well...he's a dad to me really, he's looked after me since I came here, he's the vet, owns the surgery, it's actually connected to the house believe it or not"

"Ahh...so how did he take it?" Jackson was intrigued by Aaron, he didn't know why.

"Absolutely fine, typical eh? I worry about telling people and then they're fine" he chuckled.

Jackson nodded. "That's usually the case, for other people it might take some getting used too but they come round eventually, but my dad? Different story altogether, our relationship has never been the same since" Jackson told him.

"Sorry to hear that"

Jackson shook it off. "It's alright, but I wanted to come find you to also tell you how attractive I think you are, and to thankyou for fixing my van – works wonders now"

Aaron found himself looking into Jackson's eyes; he couldn't tear himself away, and instantly a complete change of attitude swooped over him. "And what kind of thankyou do you have in mind?"

Jackson ended up slowly edging towards him even closer than he already was. His lips pouted for a second as he thought. "Drink? In the pub – I mean you gotta introduce me to the fine residents of Emmerdale" he smirked.

"And then?" Aaron asked.

"And then Aaron, I don't know, we'll have to see how the night goes won't we?"

Their heads were really close now, Jackson was teasing him but his actions were louder, Aaron turned his head slightly to receive the kiss Jackson was ready to lay on his lips.

But the pair jumped away from each other quickly as the front door squeaked open...

To Be Continued...


	4. 4 Over The Top

"Over The Top"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _The Approach_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Chas stood in the doorway. "Ohhh" her voice was high pitched as it usually was. It was blatant she had interrupted something much deeper than just a friendly conversation. "I-"she stuttered. "I just came to see how you were, bye love" Chas breathed quickly, rolled her eyes as she turned around and closed the door behind her.

Jackson was sat up straight, stiff, and now rather uncomfortable. He sighed loudly. "Well I guessed the moments now passed" he smirked. "That your mum?"

Aaron rolled his eyes as he nodded.

"Ahh she doesn't seem too bad, you look like her though"

Aaron frowned and shook his head. "I don't think so" he replied as the front door opened again, this time it was Paddy and Jackson instantly stood up.

"I'll be off then" he told Aaron and walked to the door, smiled at the man who he guessed was Paddy and left.

Aaron jumped from his chair and ran to the front door, catching up just before he was too far away. "Jackson..." he said. "Sorry about that"

Jackson just smiled. "See you later"

Aaron smiled and watched him walk off. He sighed contently.

Hours later, night had set in; the pub was busy – Aaron and Jackson were sat at a table having a pint. But Aaron was increasingly becoming paranoid and unsettled, well he hadn't settled at all really since he'd walked into the pub. He didn't like this feeling; this was one of the reasons why he didn't want to tell people he was gay.

Jackson sensed this distance Aaron was giving off, and was well aware of his 'date' well if he could call him that, glancing around the pub nervously. Jackson moved closer. "It's alright you know" he spoke quietly.

Aaron was jittery and he quickly turned to face him with a fixed scowl. "Oh it is, is it?" he snapped and he immediately felt Jacksons hand on his leg.

"Just relax" Jackson tried to soothe him.

Aaron's heartbeat quickened rapidly, sweat forming on his brow, his body felt like it was burning. He was panicking, he looked around, he flinched away and in a split second he stood up, grabbed Jackson by his shirt collar, pulled him and then threw him back down onto the floor knocking a table over in the process.

"Hey!" Diane yelled.

Aaron was raging. His breathing was hard. He turned to look and briefly saw everyone staring. He bolted for the door.

He didn't know where he was going, all he needed to do was get out of the village, and the place he thought of first was the garage, he could get a car and he ran as fast as he could to it.

Jackson sat up, still on the floor of the woolpack, completely confused and disheartened by what Aaron had just done. He shook his head in disbelief and started to get up but as he did a hand took hold of his. He looked up and saw Aaron's mum. "I'm so sorry about him; I don't know what's got into him lately" Chas apologised.

"Don't apologise for him" Jackson sighed. "I'm sorry..." he shook his head.

"Noo, no, don't be, come on I'll get you a drink" Chas told him and walked with him to the bar and got them both a drink, hers came with her usual favourite coloured straw.

"I take it you and Aaron are...?" Chas began, but speaking quietly.

"Well...I'd like too but every time I try and get to know him he runs a mile"

"He never told me, but Adam mentioned him and the attempted kiss, but Aaron never actually said the words..." she shrugged. "Doesn't bother me in the slightest..."

Jackson sighed. "I know it's not easy but-"Jackson was stopped by the sound of a revving engine outside close to the pub. He frowned and pushed himself up and away from the bar and headed for the door – Chas followed.

Aaron was sat in one of the cars from the garage, ready to be fixed, but he didn't know that – he took it as done and ready to go back to its owner.

When he saw Jackson walk out the pub his expression turned to rage again

"Oh my god! What the hell is he doing?" Chas yelled, frightened for him.

Aaron slammed his foot all the way onto the accelerator and with a deafening screech from the tyres he pulled away harshly, at first a little out of control as he sped past Smithy, leaving a trail of smoke behind.

It didn't take long for Aaron to realise that something was majorly wrong, and he panicked a little, the steering had locked and the brakes weren't working, he was heading for the bus stop too fast for anyone's liking. Momentarily the car bumped up onto the kerb and drove through the bus stop, ending up in the field behind.

"Aaron! Shit!" Jackson panicked and ran to him, followed by a teary and an also panicked Chas.

To Be Continued...


	5. 5 Fury

"Fury"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Over The Top_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

As they ran round to the front of the car, they saw Aaron; and Jackson quickly yanked the driver's door open, Aaron was a little dazed. Chas pulled her phone out and rang Cain. "What the hell were you thinking you stupid idiot!" she yelled as she waited for the call to connect.

Aaron slowly pulled himself out of the car. "That make you feel better does it Aaron? I'm sure you love hurting people, oh it must fill you with joy to see me and your mum like this, and it's not fair!"

Aaron clearly wasn't listening as he leaned against the car, silently.

Jackson went to touch him again to turn his face to the side so he could check out the cuts on his forehead.

Aaron flinched away yet again. "Get away from me" he spat and stormed off, out of the field and back into the village.

Chas followed him as did Jackson. "Love, come on, calm down!" Chas tried to make him see reason.

"No!" he yelled as he walked quickly, Cain walked out of the pub, he didn't wanna ask right now.

Chas shook her head at him as a pre warning anyway. "It's up there" she told him as she and Jackson continued to follow him.

"What was he playing at?" Aaron was raging. Chas had never ever seen him like that ever. Then he turned briefly and looked at Jackson. "You do not do that ever!"

Chas stopped, this was between them now and nothing she ever said was able to get through to her son.

"No Aaron I do, you give me false signals, - what was that in the pub, I was only trying to be nice!" Jackson defended.

Hazel had just left the shop and was startled to find a screaming match between the lads as they walked swiftly through the village making a scene, by now a few of the locals started to walk out of the pub to find out what the commotion was "Jackson leave him" she told him with a sigh.

"No!" he snapped. "This needs sorting mum, I'm sick of this!"

"Nothing to sort, do one Jackson!" Aaron's quick pace was maintained. His back was to him.

Jackson kept biting. "No, whatever or whoever has put this chip on your shoulder needs sorting Aaron!"

Aaron didn't reply.

Jackson was getting more and more frustrated by the second. "God! You're gay Aaron, deal with it!" he yelled at the top of his voice, stopping in his tracks as he shouted it.

The residents outside the pub looked shocked and they began talking amongst themselves in disbelief.

Aaron stopped, straightened his back as if trying to repel the words. But it didn't work and he knew that, the words broke through, he knew it was true. He turned around to face Jackson, and instantly saw the small crowd. He swallowed hard, and stared, unsure of what to do.

"Being gay is not that bad Aaron" Jackson told him more gently now.

"SHUT UP!" Aaron shouted, the veins in his neck bulged as the anger coursed through him.

Jackson shook his head. "When I touched your leg in there I felt some kind of connection Aaron, you can't say you didn't? And then earlier – I gather it wasn't you tried to kiss me then, in your kitchen?" he asked.

And again, more jaws dropped as the crowd were listening.

Chas was standing with Hazel, her eyes red from the tears she'd shed as she watched this all unfold for Aaron. _It didn't have to be this way love _she thought to herself, and then she noticed the small gathering. "Ay! Shows over, stop gawping at them, it's none of your business"

They all started to go back inside the pub.

Jackson heard Chas shouting and he turned around and looked up the village and saw the crowd. He lowered his head and sighed. "Aaron I-I didn't know...I'm so-"

Aaron barged past him, knocking into his shoulder. "Save it" he cut him off. "Damage is done" he stormed back up the village, ignoring his mum and walked straight for the cottage.

Inside he slammed the door. "Paddy!" he yelled and walked through the kitchen to the living room to find him watching tv. He was sat up startled. "I can't take this anymore, I can't do it!"

"Hey..." Paddy stood. "It's alright, what's happened? Sit down"

Paddy led him over to the couch and sat him down.

"Jackson tried to touch me in the pub, I flipped, I-I" he breathed as the tears fell.

"I pushed him over, I went to the garage, got a car, lost control of it, went through the bus stop..." he pointed to his head.

Paddy nodded. "Ahh..." he was patient, non judgemental about this. He just wanted to know what had gotten the lad so wound up.

"Then we argued through the village, did you not hear?" he frowned as he asked.

Paddy shook his head. "No – no, I dozed off not long ago..."

"Oh sorry..." Aaron replied. "Then obviously people started coming out the pub to see what was going on, and Jackson shouted that I was gay..." Aaron put his head in his hands. "Everybody knows" he cried.

Paddy instantly pulled him into a hug. "Don't take this the wrong way Aaron, but it's probably a good thing" he continued before he had chance to reply. "In time you'll realise, don't say anything, just think about it Aaron, now you can start to be you"

Aaron lifted his head, wiped his eyes and got up. "I just need to be on my own"

Paddy understood. "Go on then" he smiled slightly.

Aaron then set about to his room.

Paddy was in the kitchen an hour later making a coffee when he heard a knock at the door. He went to open it and Jackson was standing there. "Hi...um I'm Jackson I know we haven't properly been introduced..."

Paddy nodded. "You want Aaron?"

Jackson nodded. "But if you wouldn't mind? Could I just go up? I need to see him alone and I just need to apologise I didn't know half the pub were listening..." he sighed.

"I know that" Paddy nodded. "But one thing you gotta learn about this place Jackson, everyone's one for gossip" Paddy stepped aside to let him in. "Stay as long as you need too"

"Thanks Paddy" he was grateful for this.

When he'd actually figured out what room was Aaron's he knocked on the door quietly. But there was no answer. He pulled the handle and opened it, he saw Aaron lying on the bed with his back to the doorway, and the bedside lamp was switched on, the curtains were closed.

He walked to the bed and slowly sat on it. Aaron didn't move, but unknown to Jackson he was awake - in his room; he could face up to who he was, what he was. But out there, it frightened him.

"I'm so sorry" Jackson whispered.

Aaron closed his eyes and tears escaped them.

"I didn't know...I just got frustrated, last time I looked, and the village was empty"

"Jackson..." Aaron spoke quietly.

"Yeah?"

"Shut up and just hold me – please?" he could hear that Aaron's voice was shaky.

Jackson let out a breath and smiled as he lifted his legs onto the bed and lay down beside him and he immediately put his arm over him pulling him close.

Aaron was at immediate ease; he took hold of Jackson's strong hand and kissed the back of it softly. "I'm sorry" he told him.

"Shhh just relax, I'm here" Jackson was supportive. He knew it must be hard for Aaron but he didn't really make things easy for himself either which was something he'd noticed. It made him smile. "It really isn't as bad as it seems" Jackson repeated what he'd said earlier outside.

"I hope not" Aaron whispered

Jackson leaned down to kiss him on the head but before he could Aaron turned on his back and their eyes locked on one another. Jackson was so close; he could feel his warmth, his breath. It was intoxicating. Aaron lifted himself onto his elbows, placed his hand on the side of Jacksons face to pull him closer until their lips met for the very first time in a passionate embrace. Now, Jackson knew Aaron's true feelings.

To Be Continued...


	6. 6 Love Is In The Air

"Love Is In The Air"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Fury_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Aaron felt the strong arm of Jackson around him as his eyes fluttered open. Jackson was so so close to him. They were both still clothed and on top of the duvet. He smiled until of course the events of last night flooded back, he gasped as he remembered. He was out. Everyone would know by now, and he wasn't truly ready for that; he didn't blame Jackson, as a matter of fact it made him like him even more if that was even possible. Last night Jackson helped Aaron in a way he'd never realise and Aaron was grateful.

Nothing more than a steamy kissing session happened the night before but Aaron smiled to himself as he watched Jackson sleep, pushing the dilemma of facing the village to the back of his mind for now. Jackson looked so peaceful and fit, Aaron wanted to ravage him if he was being honest with himself and he smirked at the image running wild in his head.

Aaron sighed contently and moved as carefully as he could onto his back fully, trying not to wake Jackson. He rested his head on his arm, and his gaze quickly returned to Jackson again, he was transfixed by him.

Moments later Jackson began to stir, he moaned and groaned softly, fighting against his body waking him. He hated mornings. But then he realised where he was and he opened his eyes with a pleasing smile. Aaron was staring at him; it was nice to see actually. "Well, well...you're fit, where did you come from?" Jackson smirked.

"Yeah so are you, can't keep my eyes off you"

Jackson knew by the tone of his voice that he was being genuine. He smiled at Aaron. "I loved last night"

Aaron gave him his usual smirk. "Yeah, me too, do you wanna go for a drink tonight in the pub?"

Jackson sat up and rubbed his eyes and he felt Aaron's arm around his lower back. He smiled again; it felt nice being so close to someone in that way. He hadn't in a long time but he stopped thinking then; not wanting to remember that time in his life. "Are you sure? Just after last night..."

Aaron smiled. "Jackson, people know now, I'll adjust, starting when I leave this house – as nerve wracking as it'll be, I'll be fine" he reassured him with his charming smile.

Jackson smiled and planted a firm kiss on Aaron, forcing him back down onto his pillow.

Half an hour later, Aaron turned up for work a little sheepishly, his hands in his pockets. Yes – it was time to face Cain. "Alright?" he asked as he approached him.

Cain turned around and looked at him, but remembered the talk he and Chas had after he'd retrieved the car from the field. He knew about Aaron and this Jackson situation, so he decided he would let it go this time. He nodded as he wiped the oil on his hands onto his overalls.

Aaron nodded. "Right, I'll get to work then" he quickly half smiled and started to walk into the garage passing Cain.

"Aaron" Cain said and he turned around to his uncle.

"Your mum told me and don't be mad with her, I made her tell me what was going on and it's alright, I've got your back just please don't go taking cars again alright?"

Aaron smiled and then thought. "What about the bus stop?"

Cain chuckled. "Do you see CCTV around here?"

Aaron shook his head.

"Well then" Cain smirked before getting back to work.

When Jackson got home, he walked into the living room and he could hear his mum in the kitchen. "Alright mum?" he called.

"Oh..." she appeared in the doorway. "My boy has decided to return, where did you get too last night?"

"Aaron's" he replied.

"Ahh..." was all she said and started walking back to the kitchen but stopped and turned back to him. "There's a card there for you, on the side" she smiled.

Jackson frowned, walked over and picked it up.

And hazel, as usual being her nosy self walked up to him. "Is it off Aaron?" she asked as he unravelled the sheet of paper.

Jackson read the words on the paper, and swallowed hard.

"No" he shook his head. "No it's not Aaron's writing – this I can understand clearly" he replied, his words meaning more than what his mum would understand.

"When have you seen Aaron's writing?" she asked curiously, being nosy again.

"The invoice from the van mum" he shot her a look and sighed.

"Ohhh, right...anyway, I'm going out, going to see if I can get a job to fill in the time when I'm not teaching and looking after you, oh but be a gem and do me a favour, fix the window frame outside my bedroom" she didn't wait for an answer and left before he could give one. _Oh I do love having a handyman as a son _she sighed contently.

It was midday, Aaron walked to Viv's for the dinner run, he opened his bottle of water and took a sip but he nearly choked at the sight he saw as he looked towards Dale Head, it was a hot day so he couldn't blame him really. Jackson was up a ladder with his top off, earphones in, fixing the base of the window frame.

Aaron stopped in his tracks and just stared, the feelings of ravaging him again sprung to mind and he stood there motionless, he was turned on. Aaron didn't realise however that his bottle was tipping in his hand and it started to spill, and he also didn't see Hazel in the doorway.

"Aaron..." she called to him.

She got no reply.

"Aaron!" she called louder, actually catching his attention. He looked at her.

"You're dribbling love..." she told him.

Aaron frowned.

"And not from your mouth either" she laughed and walked back inside, leaving Aaron standing there blushing.

Aaron looked down and saw the water bottle empty, he laughed to himself, shook his head and carried on walking, still undressing Jackson even more with his eyes as he kept turning back to stare.

"Good day?" Paddy asked when Aaron walked into the kitchen all dressed casually, but not too much.

"Yeah not bad, um...I'm going out so don't bother making me any food, I think me and Jackson are going to get a takeaway later or something" Aaron told him as he leaned against the bench.

"Ohh you and Jacksonn" Paddy teased.

Aaron grabbed the tee towel and whipped him playfully smirking as he did. "Yes me and Jackson – I really like him Paddy"

Paddy smiled. "I know you do, and if you get any grief in the pub, not likely but still, just call me and I'll deal with them, I don't want you flying off the handle again"

Aaron smiled. "I know, I won't though, tonight is just about me and Jackson, I don't care what people think Paddy, I've had time to think today, Cain's ok with it, mum is, you are, Jackson obviously, you lot are all that matter to me"

Paddy looked at him with a warm smile. That meant a lot to hear. "Go on lad, enjoy" he told him.

Aaron nodded as he pushed himself away from the bench and walked to the front door. "See ya" he called and shut the door behind him.

When he approached the woolpack, he saw Jackson waiting outside. _Wow _he thought.

"Thought you were standing me up there for a sec" Jackson told him as he got closer.

Aaron shook his head. "I'd never stand you up Mr. Walsh" he smirked.

Jackson jumped down from the table and stood close, kissing him on the lips. "You look good" he breathed. "Hair immaculately done, no overalls, jeans, black top, smell amazing, Mmmm" he smirked.

Aaron chuckled. "Thankyou"

"No worries come on then Mr. Livesy...our date, which; might I add I've looked forward to all day...awaits"

They started walking through the doors. "Were you looking forward to it, half naked up a ladder?" Aaron whispered with a smirk.

Jackson turned and looked at him. "So you saw then?"

"Oh yes, how could I not? I work around the corner" he said as they stood at the bar. Aaron was well aware of the looks and the muttered discussions now they had walked in. His heart quickened and his breathing became fast also.

Jackson saw the change immediately, but he was there for him. He hesitated but thought better of it; and placed his hand on Aaron's. "You alright?" he looked into his eyes.

Aaron nodded and let out a breath. "Yeah..."

"Good, two pints please Moira" Jackson asked.

"Sit down you two, I'll bring them over" she smiled.

A while later, Aaron was happy the evening was moving nicely, he loved spending time with Jackson, they had differing personalities which strangely suited, opposites in this case certainly did attract. Their sense of humour however was on par with one another's. Aaron didn't realise this but he was watching him adoringly as he spoke taking in every word, every sound he made, and every single movement he made.

Their closeness now was bordering on intimate, Jackson stopped as he gazed into his eyes and he slowly moved in to kiss him which Aaron rejected his mind deep down still reminding him of where he actually was and his protective barriers kicked in.

Jackson backed off. He didn't know what to do instead he let his instincts take over. "Wow...I got that wrong didn't I?" he sighed and stood up, shaking his head as he made his way to the door.

Aaron lowered his head and shook it as he thought this through. If he wanted Jackson he had to get up now, face his fears. And he did. "Jackson..." he called after him, running through the tables that were dotted around. He caught up to him just before he left the bar area.

Aaron took a breath, ignored the locals and put his hand on Jackson's neck and pulled him close so he could kiss him passionately. It lasted for a good few seconds and when they withdrew, Aaron looked into his eyes. "You didn't get me wrong, Jackson" he explained.

Jackson smiled. "Come on before we cause a brawl or something" he smirked.

Aaron smirked. "Nah I think they're fine, actually – strangely..." he said in between looking around for reactions. Some weren't paying attention and some were smiling, happy for them which came as a surprise to Aaron. "But yeah let's go, I'm starving and I'm paying" Aaron told him as they walked out into the cool night air.

Jackson laughed. "No you're not!"

"Jackson, please first date and all that" deep down they were both kidding themselves this was no date, how could they date each other for weeks, months however long it took without doing anything together apart from kissing, Jackson sensed it and so did Aaron.

"No, Aaron, I'm treating you" he smiled and took his hand.

"Yeah I 'am try and stop me" he smirked. "Ohh look we're having our first row" Aaron wasn't really aware of what he said but that confirmed a lot to Jackson.

Jackson smiled, shaking his head, he couldn't help but chuckle. "Well we'll see who pays when we fight our way to the door to pay the man"

"Suits me" Aaron shrugged, a playful look on his face which told Jackson he wasn't serious with the -oh so well known shrug. Aaron took his hand as they walked.

There was music playing, the room was lit, but very dimmed and comfortable, both men sat cuddled on the sofa as they talked. But eventually a silence fell upon them; there was no awkwardness with it or a sense of feeling the need to speak just to fill the quietness. It was very relaxed; Aaron turned his head up to Jackson and saw him smirking. "What?" he asked.

"Nothing" Jackson shook his head, and sighed. "Well actually...Aaron..." he looked at him. "I know this might sound crazy considering we haven't actually known each other for long but I think I'm falling in love with you"

It was then with those words that Aaron turned round, welcomed those words with open arms, and gently pushed his body against Jackson's as he kissed his neck softly, the stubble on Jackson's neck rubbed against his cheek. Jackson's eyes fell closed at the pleasure. Aaron briefly stopped as he lifted himself up onto his knees. Their eyes locked on each other and Aaron started to lift up his top and removed it.

Aaron's look said something to Jackson, it was different. But he correctly assumed what it was. "Are you sure?" he held Aaron by his waist.

Aaron nodded. "I've never been more sure about anything in my life" his voice was whispery.

"But you're shaking..." Jackson told him.

Aaron swallowed. "Because I've never had sex with a man before, you'd be my first, and only I would hope because I'm falling for you too, every time I see you my mind starts to race...an-" he was stopped when Jackson's index finger was placed on his lips.

Over an hour later, Aaron lifted his head from Jackson's ripped torso; they were laid naked on the couch. Jackson sat up too and kissed Aaron's shoulder softly. "You okay?" Jackson's voice was smooth and quiet.

"I 'am" he smiled and fell back into him briefly. "But we need to get covered up before your mum comes home and catches us naked...I mean..." Aaron became distracted when he turned to look at his lover. "I don't mind but you know"

Jackson smirked, kissed him quickly and jumped up off the couch, pulled his boxers on quickly and ran upstairs. Aaron did the same while Jackson was away, and he also tidied their clothes into a neat pile after they were scattered all over the living room, all the while thinking _Hazel, please don't walk in, not yet anyway _

He breathed a sigh of relief when Jackson returned with a quilt. He watched him as he flopped back on the sofa and held the quilt up, waiting. "Come on then" he chuckled.

Aaron didn't need to be told twice and he lay back on the sofa, in between Jackson's legs and rested his head on his stomach. He kissed it softly. "You were amazing Jackson, thankyou" He thanked him because he had never experienced anything like that before and Jackson was so loving, gentle and caring towards him as they made love for the first time.

They both nodded off entwined in one another.

Hazel opened the front door quietly, just in case Jackson was asleep. She had been around Bob's who she had become friendly with since moving there. When she walked into the living room, she heard the music and she also saw Jackson and Aaron lying together asleep on the couch. _About time _she thought with a smile before she walked out, closed the living room door and headed up to bed.

To Be Continued...


	7. 7 The Delivery

"The Delivery"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Love Is In The Air_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

The sound of horrendous singing coming from the kitchen woke Jackson; he instantly noted that he and Aaron had moved during the night and were now spooning each other. Jackson frowned at the noise but smirked down at him. He could sleep through anything; he moved down closer and kissed the side of his forehead.

Jackson slowly and carefully lifted himself up and climbed over Aaron, without disturbing him. He placed the duvet back over him properly and Jackson picked his jeans up and put them on quickly and pulled on his top, leaving it ragged, he was still waking up to care. He leaned against the door frame leading into the kitchen, with his arms folded frowning.

Hazel was unaware her son was standing there; she stood at the oven, holding the spatula seeing to the bacon. Still singing.

Jackson held in his laugh. "Everybody in love – mum, seriously?" he laughed.

Hazel jumped. "Jesus, you frightened the life out of me Jackson, behave yourself" she turned and smirked. "And yes actually, I do happen to listen to the radio you know, just because I'm an older lady doesn't mean my music interests have to be stuck in the past"

Jackson nodded. "What? The twenties?"

"Hey you! And anyway I quite like that little one, got a nice set of abs on him" she informed him.

Jackson nodded agreeing completely.

"Oooohhh if I was thirty years younger" Hazel drifted off into a world of her own.

"You perve" he laughed. "C'mon chop chop mum, I'm starving"

Hazel sighed and shook her head. "Keep your boxers on..." she pretended to laugh. "Or did you forget all together when you got dressed – well I say dressed, look at the state of ya"

Jackson blushed. "Yeah alright mum"

Hazel returned to her attention to the sizzling bacon. Jackson then heard Aaron behind him. "Jackson..." he spoke.

Jackson turned seeing him dressed. "I'll get off" he kissed him. "I'll text you in a bit yeah? Don't wanna intrude" he smiled.

Aaron turned and walked to the front door but Hazel caught him before he could leave. "Excuse me?"

Aaron turned to look at her.

"Get in here, breakfast's ready" she told him, a warm smiled curled her lips.

Aaron smiled and nodded, he was not going to defy this woman, and he quite liked her, so far anyway.

Hazel walked back into the kitchen.

"Thanks mum" Jackson whispered gratefully.

Breakfast was over and they were sat around the table chattering away, when Hazel looked at them both. "There's something I need clearing up" she looked at them both thoughtfully.

"And what's that?" Aaron asked with a smile.

"What's going on with you two?" she smiled.

Jackson turned his head to Aaron and took his hand, and Aaron gave him a nod. "We're together mum"

"Ohh" her face lit up accompanied with huge grin. "I thought to myself Hazel, I thought it's about time too, especially when I saw you two asleep, oh you both really are cute together you know"

Jackson blushed, half a smile on his face while Aaron frowned.

"Cute?" Aaron asked.

"Yeahh" she enthused.

Their conversation on Aaron and Jacksons new found love life was stopped by a loud thud at the front door. Jackson got up. "I'll see what that is" he smiled as he left the kitchen; leaving his boyfriend and mum chatting.

When he walked into the doorway he looked down onto the mat and saw a wrench lying there. Jackson gulped and an overwhelming warm feeling washed over him as he panicked. No one knew Aaron was there, well even if they did why they would drop a wrench through the door from the garage was beyond him but in fact he knew why, it all related to that note. Jackson was freaking out he didn't know what to do. He slammed his hand on the handle opening the front door swiftly. He stood outside, walking to the gate, looking around the village as far as he could see – no one was around, it was really quiet - a ghost town.

The panic never left him as he put the wrench in the bin, there was nowhere else he could put it and if Aaron saw it Jackson knew there would be questions and he couldn't face that.

When he walked back into the house, he took his mums picture down off the wall and took out the small nail and placed it against the wall next to the shoe rack. "What was it love?" Hazel asked when he returned to the kitchen, she then frowned. "You look like you've seen a ghost?"

"You alright mate?" Aaron asked a little concerned, watching Jackson walk around him to sit back down.

"Uh yeah, don't worry" he placed his hand on Aaron's leg. "Don't feel too good actually, it was the picture on the wall in the doorway fell off – I'll put it back up in a bit..."

"Ahh I see" Hazel smiled. "Come on then you...dishes, I'll dry" Hazel smiled sarcastically, waiting for some kind of reaction from Jackson for making his boyfriend help tidy, but there was none. That actually concerned her.

Aaron chuckled. "Yeah alright then" he agreed and stood up.

"You sure you're okay?" Aaron asked Jackson before walking to the sink.

Jackson shook his head quickly as he was brought back to reality from his own thoughts. "Oh...yeah – yeah fine gorgeous" he smiled. "I'll be back in a minute" with that Jackson stood and left the kitchen.

Before he headed upstairs there was a knock at the door that frightened the life out of him; he jumped and hesitantly answered the door, and was relieved to see a delivery man. "Package for a Mr. Walsh?" the man spoke.

"Yeah that's me" Jackson nodded and the man handed over the jiffy bag, Jackson took it.

"Just sign here please"

Jackson took the delivery note and signed it. "Cheers mate" he closed the door and ran upstairs, closing his bedroom door quietly and sat on his bed before opening the package quickly. When it was torn he tipped it upside down and a chunk of photographs fell out. Jackson almost scrambled to get them in his hands. When he turned them over and removed the elastic band holding them together. There was no other word to describe his feelings right now other than scared, he was. The pictures were time stamped of Aaron working, walking through the village, talking to Adam – everyday things. Someone was spying on him, it all then came together and he took the note from the previous day off his bedside table. He opened it up again. 'I'LL BE WATCHING HIM'

Jackson knew who was doing this - his crazy borderline psycho ex, or maybe not so borderline now and he knew why, Dave was possessive towards Jackson even violent and when Jackson left, it sent him over the edge completely. But he was just so glad he was away from him. Jackson was so scared by him when he eventually got the guts to walk out, it took him a long time to heal physically; mentally yes he was ok now but it was understandably still with him, he never in a million years thought Dave loved him so badly he'd do this all because Jackson left, even when the reason for him leaving was his violent nature. Dave was unstable and it scared Jackson – he didn't know how far he'd go with all of this. Jackson couldn't tell Aaron, he would deal with this alone when he was able to find him of course. Seconds later the gut wrenching feeling began to rise and he bolted to the bathroom and was sick.

Jackson was completely unprepared for what was to come...

To Be Continued...


	8. 8 Closer Than You Think

"Closer Than You Think"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on **2 weeks** from _The Delivery_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Jackson couldn't find him, he'd moved out of the place he shared with Jackson a while ago apparently according to one of the neighbours. Jackson kicked the gate in frustration once the neighbour had gone back inside. "When I find you I swear to god I'll fucking kill you!" Jackson muttered to himself angrily as he started to walk back to his van, slamming the door hard once he got back in it.

Things had progressively gotten worse over the last few weeks, more photos of Aaron were delivered, the one that scared him more than ever was one taken inside Smithy cottage, from that point on Jackson stayed with Aaron every single night, refusing to part with him, unless he had to work or was with somebody else. He knew Aaron was feeling a little caged in and he felt horrible for that, Jackson was never the smothering type and he hated the fact that Aaron might think he was. Jackson slumped against the steering wheel, his forehead rested against it as he fought the urge to breakdown. He couldn't. His job was to see that Aaron was safe; he didn't care about himself.

When he pulled up outside of Dale Head, he looked up to Smithy – everything looked okay, but he was just making a flying visit. "You off to Aaron's again?" Hazel asked him.

Jackson nodded. "Yeah...Why?"

"I just-I just don't want your relationship to be over before it has a chance to fully blossom" Hazel had to be careful there she didn't want another round of snappy, angry Jackson.

"It won't end up finished, trust me; I love him more than he knows" Jackson said with a sigh.

"Well then, explain to me all these letters and deliveries you've been getting lately?" Hazel stood from the couch and walked to him. "Speaking of deliveries...there's a parcel on the stairs for you"

Jackson walked quickly to the stairs and brought the bag into the living room with him; he sat on the sofa and proceeded to open it. He looked up at his mum as he did. "It's Dave mum"

Hazel frowned. "Dave – Dave?" she asked.

"Yes Dave, he's found out where I am and he's watching Aaron, the letters, deliveries – threats, photos of Aaron, the other day one of the photos was inside Paddy's! He's a psycho" Jackson began to sob. "And I'm scared, I'm scared to death, that's why I can't leave Aaron, he means too much to me, I can't let anything happen to him"

Hazel was instantly holding him in her arms, no questions asked. She remembered Dave, and boy did she hold so much anger for that man enough to last her a life time, he hurt her only boy, she saw the cuts, the bruises and now he was doing it again by way of Aaron. "Give me this..." she didn't wait instead she instantly took the parcel from Jackson's lap. "We'll open it together, god Jackson, this explains a lot..." she sighed. "You should have told me – have you told the police?" she asked as she finished opening it.

"Oh and what are they gunna do? I've looked everywhere I can think of, I can't find him, when I've asked the delivery men they say there's no return address"

"They can do more than you can Jackson" she looked him in the eye. She felt something soft before she saw it – she pulled it out. It was Aarons grey jumper – torn to shreds and a note. "I know it's hard, stay calm..." she told him before she read the note out loud. _**"You'll never find me; you destroyed me, and now – well let's see how your little Aaron fairs shall we? X **_

Jackson could have been sick at that moment. "Why is he doing this?" Jackson raged.

"It's clear Jackson, if he can't have you, no one can" Hazel hated what she just said but that's what it boiled down too.

Jackson just looked at her.

"Love, let's go to the police station – He's on appointments I think from what Marlon said earlier but Paddy will be home soon, " she reassured him. "Aaron will be fine; we have to deal with this, now before someone's hurt"

Jackson pinched his lower lip in between his finger and thumb, his mind raced with thoughts of the worst case scenario. He nodded. "You're right; you're right..." he stood slowly. "I need to tell them..."

Hazel nodded and led him out the front door, locking it behind her. She hated Jacksons van, all the dust, dirt and rubbish all over the place. "Can't you just get a car or something?" she sighed as she climbed inside.

Paddy had gotten home at eight; much later than anticipated; he was on the phone to Marlon when he walked through the door. "Alright, alright, just give me half an hour and I'll come round...alright, bye" he put the phone down and smiled at Aaron as he was making a coffee. "Good day?"

"Yeah not bad" Aaron smirked. "You?"

Paddy sighed. "Yeah, just sorry I'm home late, and now Marlon wants me to go round his, have you eaten?"

"Yes, I got something earlier, and don't worry, you go have fun, you've been out since eight this morning...twelve hours"

"Have fun..." Paddy nodded in agreement. "I will" he smiled before going upstairs to get freshened up.

It had been an hour since Paddy left for Marlon's, Aaron was just lazing around watching TV. He'd locked the door leading into the surgery, and the front door. Paddy had a key and Jackson would call before he came round. It didn't take him long before boredom overcame him. "Come on Jackson, house to ourselves and all that" he sighed as he sat up and turned the TV off. Aaron got out his phone and text Jackson; - _**Where are you? Xxx**_

He left his phone on the coffee table and went upstairs for a shower; he turned it on, wandered into his room and sorted his clothes pile out. He frowned after he'd put everything away. _Where's it gone? _He frowned again. _Probably at Jacksons _He left that thought there and picked up some clothes and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

A few moments later downstairs in the living room the door leading to the surgery cracked loudly and squeaked open as it was pushed open slowly. Dave's footsteps were quiet; his face filled with sheer anger, dark bags circled his eyes. He was deranged; it was clear to see. He unscrewed the cap, the smell that was unleashed pleased him and an evil smile appeared on his face as he happily poured the petrol over the furniture, the walls, the carpet and left a trail behind him as he walked into the kitchen. In their, he did the same, threw the petrol everywhere. He stopped and dropped the can, he reached into his pocket and took out a box of matches, he took one out, swiped it across the coarse edge of the box, the scratching sound was fast as the spark ignited, and the flame came to life. He let it drop into the flammable liquid; he pulled up his hood and made a brisk exit.

To Be Continued...


	9. 9 Blazing Inferno

"Blazing Inferno"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on **directly** from _Closer Than You Think_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Aaron had just gotten out the shower and he started to dry himself. He was unaware of the blazing inferno on the floor below.

The flames had spread and was now blazing up the walls in the living room, across the carpet and onto the furniture, smoke bellowing out from everything it burnt. The doorway into the kitchen was on fire, the cupboards were black but the flames still raged on, the well used kitchen table was now burnt to a crisp, the flames engulfed the entire ground floor, the smoke rose up the stairway as did the flames, they became more intense as it burnt untarnished materials and the paint on the walls.

Aaron was dressed now and he stood for a second, placing his hands on his waist. He sniffed several times, did he really smell that? When he focussed more he could hear a whisking wind sound and when he turned he saw black smoke seeping through the small gaps all around the door. His eyes widened and he began rethinking every single thing he'd done that night, had he caused this? He thought so, wherever Aaron went so did disaster. But he did not have time to think about that, he had to get out, he could feel the heat as he reached for the door handle. That wasn't going to work was it? Aaron pulled his sleeve down over his hand and quickly grabbed the handle, the heat seeped through to his hand quickly and he pulled his hand away as he winced in pain, but he managed to open the door, black smoke flooded into the room as did a wall of heat which burned, his skin felt like it was being scratched as the heat came into contact with him.

Aaron tried to ignore it; he took deep breaths and ventured to the doorway _Stay Calm Livesy, just stay calm _he thought. When he stepped onto the landing, he began to cough, just a little at first but as he walked further, the coughing was harsher- all he could see was the smoke and the bright burning orange from the flames. He could sense how far he had gone; he'd lived there long enough to know the layout. Aaron placed his hand over his mouth but quickly realised that wasn't going to work. He panicked, the smoke stung his eyes and they began to water. Aaron had no choice in the matter if he was going to survive he had to take his off his top, and he did and pushed it hard against his face, covering his nose and mouth, the thought of wetting it came to mind but there was no way he was going back to the bathroom, he'd got this far.

Aaron stared; he could just see the flame ridden front door and the tiny doorway through the smoke. The flames ravaged the walls and a little bit of the carpets edge, but it was expanding quickly. He froze, panicking, the sweat poured from all over his body. But he knew he couldn't stay there, and without a thought he bolted down the stairs, a few of the flames seared his skin, in which it instantly melted the skin it came into contact. Aaron was in pain.

It was dark, Adam was on his quad, on his way to see Aaron, as he got closer to the village, even in the darkness he saw the smoke. There was too much, he frowned. This wasn't normal. He sped up and when he got closer he stopped outside, jumping off the quad. Looking up at the house he swallowed hard. "Oh my god!" He took his phone out as he ran to the pub. Jackson answered.

"Jackson!" Adam almost yelled. "Is Aaron with you?" he asked. His frown deepened. "Paddy's is on fire, please don't tell me he's in there?" "Shit! Jackson, hurry up, I'll get Chas, and Paddy" he put his phone back in his pocket as he bolted into the pub, alarming everyone.

Chas turned on her stool, Adam was looking right at her.

She frowned. "You alright Adam?" she asked.

"No, Paddy's is on fire, I just rang Jackson, Aaron's not with him"

Chas jumped off the stool and ran out of the pub. "Oh my god" he voice was shaky. Everyone in the pub left to see what was happening, but Declan, Nikhil, Jai, Cain and Zak ran up to the cottage after Chas. "I've tried calling but it won't connect" she told Cain.

Diane was in the middle of the 999 call as Adam left the pub. "Where's Paddy?"

Katie was speechless. "I-I saw him heading to Marlon's earlier"

Adam nodded and ran to Marlon's and banged on the door...

The sirens could be heard several minutes later and two fire engines pulled up outside, most of the firemen began setting up the hoses and a few made everyone back away from the house.

Jackson's van screeched to a halt and he jumped out of his van and ran through his friends. He didn't have time to think. "Oh no you don't lad" Declan saw him coming and ran to stop him and grabbed him by the waist pulling him away.

"Aaron's in there!" Jackson shouted.

"I know Jackson, but they know what they're doing!" Declan told him.

In an instant, screams could be heard as an explosion wracked through the village, Jackson could even feel the ground shake. The front of Paddy's house, from the kitchen window to the front door was blown off. Bricks flew everywhere but luckily they cause any further damage or injury.

Paddy was shell shocked as he approached his home. He began running as the scene became more real. He got to Cain, Chas and Zack. Chas was kneeling on the floor crying her eyes out.

"What the hell happened, where's Aaron?" he asked.

"He's inside..." Cain lowered his head

Paddy shook his head frantically. "B-B-But he was fine when I left, he was watching telly waiting for Jackson, the oven wasn't on or anything, the iron" he took a deep breath. "Why aren't they doing anything!" Paddy raged.

Jackson had managed to finally lose Declan in the crowd. He'd heard Paddy and he ran – ran as fast as he could, ducked under the barrier that had been placed there and ran for the large opening in the house.

A few of the firemen chased after Jackson but he ran around them, he was too quick and he literally jumped into the house, coughing instantly. "AARONNN!"

"Jackson NOOOO!" Hazel and a few others shouted. Hazel walked over to Chas and knelt down in front of her, she was frantically redialling Aaron's number constantly, and she was in shock.

Hazel put her arm around her. "Jackson's gunna get him out love"

"It's not working!" she was frustrated and slammed her phone down on the ground.

The hoses were shooting water over the house and in it; this was going to take time. The most senior fire man got onto his radio. "I need an ambulance here asap!" once he was off the radio he shouted again. "Get in there and get them out!" he had to yell over the noise.

Jackson had managed his way upstairs and searched around, he couldn't see. "Aaron!" he yelled again, the tears streaming down his face. He knew what or more accurately, who did this and he hated himself. Jackson coughed violently as he headed to the only room left.

Aaron was in there, unconscious on the floor underneath the window.

"Aaron!" Jackson yelled as he coughed, he looked around the room. His eyes widened when he saw his boyfriend lying unconscious. He ran to him as quick as he could, dodging the erratic flames around him.

He picked him up, kissed him on the head as he cried. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry" he repeated as he carried Aaron back the way he came. But this time, as he looked down the stairway, it proved more difficult, he was a builder, he knew the stairway wouldn't hold for much longer. He let out a deep breath as he rubbed his eyes with his free hand.

Jackson took a step and he felt the crack under his feet. His eyes widened and he took another step, the cracking expanded, it was then he decided he wasn't risking taking it a step at a time. He needed to get Aaron out of there; he'd done enough damage already.

His breathing was shaky; he couldn't touch anything to support him on the way down. He reached with his foot, missed a step and evened his weight and Aaron's on it slowly and again, until he was confident enough to jump.

"It's alright babe, I'm getting you out of here" he panicked. "Please forgive me" he spoke quietly.

Seconds later, Jackson jumped with Aaron over his shoulder; both men fell where the front door would have been. The firemen ran over and pulled Aaron away as the paramedics arrived. Jackson lay on the ground wheezing as he took in the fresh air. Once Aaron was away from the area, they ran back for Jackson and guided him to the paramedics.

Chas stopped him and gave him the tightest hug she'd ever given anyone. "Thankyou, thankyou so much" she cried.

Paddy had his hand over his mouth in disbelief. He walked to Chas and placed his arm around her and walked with her to the ambulance. Hazel grabbed Jackson into a hug. "Don't ever do that to me again, do you hear?" she yelled.

"It's all my fault" Jackson stood sobbing.

"No! Now don't you dare!" she then quietened. "We know who's fault this is, the police know everything now Jackson, they'll be doing something about it and when they know about this they'll step up their search to find him, now you get to that ambulance. I'll follow with Cain" she told him as she wiped his tears away.

Jackson hurried to the ambulance; Aaron was strapped to the stretcher with an oxygen mask over his nose and mouth. Jackson sobbed more at the sight.

"I'm sorry, we're only allo-"

Chas stopped him. "He's coming!" she yelled at the paramedic.

The paramedic nodded.

"Come on love" Chas waved her hand at him, he took it as he climbed in and sat next to her.

The doors of the ambulance closed. "Will he be okay?" Jackson sobbed.

"It's too soon to tell I'm afraid, he's taken in a lot of smoke, and he's badly burnt" he replied as he placed an oxygen mask over Jackson's face and put it over his nose and mouth aswell. "That's a brave thing you did back there"

Jackson didn't respond, he was sat staring at Aaron, his mind fraught with guilt. He could have stopped this, but he was so sure he'd be able to stop the psycho before he could do any damage. How wrong he was.

The ambulance sped away from Emmerdale with the sirens blaring.

To Be Continued...


	10. 10 Consequences

"Consequences"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on **directly** from _Blazing Inferno_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

The double swinging doors burst open when the stretcher slammed through. "Aaron Livesy, nineteen years old, was caught in a house fire, we don't know how long for, smoke inhalation and burns to his upper body" the paramedic informed the doctor that was walking at a fast pace alongside the stretcher.

Chas' heeled clicked quickly along the hospital floor as she followed.

"Alright, get him in 'resus'" the doctor told the paramedics.

"Will someone please tell me what's happening?" Chas demanded.

The doctor stopped and turned around. "Are you his mum?" he asked. Chas nodded. "His condition right now is critical, his lungs are filled with smoke, and they could possibly be burnt. There's a waiting room around the corner please just try and stay calm" he assured her.

Chas nodded and the doors swung open again and the paramedic came out of resus and took the very quiet Jackson off to a side room to get checked over.

"I'll be in the waiting room Jackson" she told him as he was led off. Her lip quivered, she wanted to cry but she remained strong. It was going to be a long, long night.

She pushed the door open to the cold empty room and sat down on the sofa and waited.

A few hours later Aaron had been moved to a private room, he had been treated as best as they could, a dressing was placed around his head where they found a deep cut along the scalp, his burns were layered with silvadene a topical cream that prevented infections in the burns and in doing so soothed them. His left ankle was revealed to be broken after a scan, and it was now in a cast. It was up to his body to bring him round; he was hooked to a ventilator he wasn't breathing on his own. His chest rose up and down automatically in tune with the ventilator. He was hooked up to tubes aswell which pumped fluids in his body to flush out any remaining toxins that he had inhaled.

Chas was sat close to the bed holding his hand, watching him; the tears fell down her cheeks. Jackson hadn't said a word at all since being checked over. He had a few bandages, around his hands and around his right arm.

"Chas..." Jackson's voice was whispery; he fought the lump that was in his throat. "This is my fault" he looked at her.

Chas frowned. "No, it's not love, don't say that, come on – he'll be fine"

Jackson shook his head. "No, please listen to me" his eyes began to fill. "About a month ago, I started getting creepy deliveries, photos of Aaron doing everyday things, Dave my uh...ex did this, he's psycho, he got a photo from inside the cottage, and he got Aarons grey jumper and ripped it up, he left a note aswell saying that I destroyed him and we'd see how my Aaron faired up" Jackson put his head in his hands.

Chas' frown deepened. "Excuse me?" her voice was quiet.

"He wants revenge for me running away, he beat me, it was a horrible time, and apparently it sent him crazy and if he can't have me, then no one can" he continued, his guilt was clear to be seen.

"And what about Aaron" she fought the urge to scream at Jackson. "HE does want you and you let this happen, what if he doesn't make it through to not have you? Hmm?" her expression was filled with anger. "And did you think of going to the police?"

Jackson looked up to the ceiling and shook his head with a sigh as he cried. "I did – last night, I wanted to deal with him myself, but when I got the jumper I realised I couldn't... Aaron didn't even know about any of this"

"Oh well I thank you for being so protective!" she was sarcastic and her voice grew louder.

"Chas I thought I was doing the right thing, you know what Aaron's like, if I told him he would have went looking and made this – never mind" he stopped.

Chas' back straightened. "What? Worse? How worse can this get Jackson? Because I'd say this is as worse as it gets, we could LOSE him Jackson, can you comprehend that? Lose – gone...and if he does..." she sighed and looked away.

Chas wiped her tears away, as did Jackson. It fell silent between them for a few moments. "I gave my statement to the police earlier – they'll find him" Jackson said and Chas just glared at him.

"I'm so so sorry" he cried. "I'll go"

Chas frowned and looked at him as he got up from the chair. "Oh no..." she shook her head frantically and she walked in front of the door. "You sit down now Jackson, you're not running away from this, Aaron needs you, you can feel as guilty as you want, I don't really care right now" Chas walked and sat down next to Jackson this time, she took a few moments to think about all of what Jackson told her then spoke and placed her hand over his. "I'm sorry love, I suppose I was looking for someone to blame and you gave me the perfect opportunity, now no, I'm far from happy about this Jackson but I understand you would have done everything you could to stop this..." she took a breath. "You didn't think about yourself for a single second when you ran into that house" she cried. "And I'm so grateful for that" she nodded and Jackson just lowered his head as he cried too.


	11. 11 Sometimes, The Truth Hurts

"Sometimes, The Truth Hurts"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Consequences_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Jackson hadn't been back to the hospital since the night of the fire. He'd stayed in the village, constant guilt kept him away, he couldn't face Aaron, and he didn't even know if he had come around yet. He was stood outside Smithy cottage, looking at the devastation he had caused; he could have stopped this from happening sooner. The surrounding area of the house was cordoned off with crime scene tape and a crime scene investigation van was pulled up on the grass outside while they gathered what evidence they could find.

Everybody knew what led to this now, and it was safe to say that not many people were speaking to him. Paddy on the other hand was, he didn't blame him.

"Jackson..."he heard a voice a few metres behind him, it was Paddy, and he turned around and faced him briefly as he was still being approached.

Paddy now stood beside him. "What you doing here?" he put his arm around his shoulders.

"I don't know really..." Jackson replied, his gaze maintained on the house.

"Look Jackson, you didn't start the fire and you weren't to know it would go this far" he told him.

"No, but I could have stopped it Paddy"

Paddy nodded but didn't say anything.

"I'll sort the house for you...I'll fix this"

"Jackson..." Paddy sighed. "I have insurance, it's covered"

"That's not the point..."

"I know but Aaron needs you, working on the house and being there for him will clash..."

"He'll understand"

Paddy shook his head. "No, Jackson he wouldn't"

Jackson sighed. "Has he woken up?"

Paddy shook his head. "No, you should go see him. You have too mate, otherwise this guilt that your in will just get worse and" Paddy shrugged. "You can't let this tear you and Aaron apart"

"He's going to hate me" Jackson replied.

"Angry and hot headed at first yeah, but once he's gotten it out of his system, he'll calm down, I know he loves you" Paddy smiled. "Go on, please"

Jackson sighed as he listened. "Okay" he nodded. "I'll go now"

When Jackson walked down the corridor to Aaron's room, he was met by a very angry looking Cain. "And where do you think you're going?" he asked.

"To sit with Aaron" Jackson continued walking but Cain pulled him away from the door and pinned him up against the window.

Chas saw this and jumped out of the chair, with a sigh; she opened the door and stood out in the corridor. "That's enough Cain!" she spoke loudly. "Leave him alone, it's not his fault alright?"

"Maybe not but he could have stopped it! My nephew is lying in there, and he won't even know why all this happened when he wakes up, I can't imagine how that would feel"

"I know I could of Cain and I regret it, you have no idea how much!" he edged just that bit too close to Cain in complete frustration.

Cain wasn't going to retaliate. He stepped back.

"And I'll tell him, he needs to hear it from me" Jackson told him. "It was my error and I'll make amends"

"Let's hope you have the chance then eh kid?" Cain stormed off.

Chas walked to Jackson and rubbed his arm gently. "Ignore him love, he'll calm down, how are your burns?" she asked.

Jackson dismissed the question almost with a slight nod to the side. "Can't feel them"

"Oh love..." she sighed, she knew what he meant by that. "Everything will be ok" she reassured him. "I'm going to go back home and get him some magazines for when he wakes, I'll nip into town and get him some new clothes just to see him over until we can sort all this out, call me if he wakes up alright?" Chas told him.

Jackson nodded and Chas walked away.

The beep from the monitor was the first thing Jackson heard when he entered the room and the artificial like breathing sound the ventilator made when it expanded and deflated.

Jackson sat on the chair next to the bed and took Aarons hand. "Come on handsome, wake up, please?" he asked with instant teary eyes. "You mean too much to me, I love you and this is killing me to see you lying lifeless, tubes, bandages all over you, I need you to wake up because I have to tell you something I should have told you weeks ago" Jackson hung his head and brought Aaron's hand closer to him and he kissed it softly. "Please babe, just wake up..." Jackson sobbed.

His words had no affect – obviously, he thought as he stood rearranging the get well soon cards that had been passed on by the locals. It was amazing to see how many people actually cared about him. It wasn't that he doubted it; he just believed what Aaron said about him thinking they didn't.

Jackson sighed and picked up the tray of grapes and opened the packet and took some out and ate them. "Oi, I mean I'm standing here eating your grapes the least you could do is give me some attitude...or maybe if I did a strip show for you, you'd soon open those eyes" Jackson stood over him and his shoulders began to jerk up and down as he broke down crying, his head lowered and his arms down at his side. "I can't live without you, I didn't realise before but now I know you're the one for me Aaron, so you need to wake up" he tried again. "So we can get you better, work through this and live our lives" he cried and turned and walked to the window and looked out, taking a minute to relax.

Moments later the sound of additional breathing on top of that of the ventilator caused him to turn around and Aaron's eyes started to open slowly. He was at his side in a second. "It's alright breath Aaron..." he ran back to the door. "Nurse!" he yelled and a woman in light blue medical overalls ran around the corner. "He's awake" Jackson told her and stepped aside to let her in.

She ran to the bed and removed the nasal mask from his face. "It's alright Aaron, try and relax you're in hospital" she said as she turned off the ventilator

Aaron was dazed; his eyes glassy, he frowned and let his head fall back onto the pillow after having lifted it to see what was happening.

The nurse looked to Jackson. "He can breathe on his own now" she smiled as she walked to the end of the bed and pulled out the file and noted the time when he had woken and what she had done.

Jackson let out a deep breath and nodded as tears strolled down his face.

She walked to him. "He's going to be fine, I'll leave you too it"

"Thankyou" Jackson said as she left and he slowly approached the bed and sat down. "Hey you" he smiled at him.

Aaron held out his hand and faintly smiled. "Hey" his voice quiet and he began to cough. Jackson was up on his feet and immediately got him some water from the jug. He held it to his mouth and placed his hand at the back of his head supporting him as he tipped the plastic cup further to allow him a drink. To which was received by more coughing. "It's alright..." Jackson said as he grabbed a tissue from the bedside and wiped up the water drips from his chin.

Aaron dropped his head back onto the pillow. "That's better" he spoke.

Jackson took his hand.

"What caused it?" he asked immediately, he remembered it rather vividly until of course he was fading and collapsed after he'd ran back up the stairs.

Jackson looked away.

"Jackson?" Aaron frowned.

"I should have told you weeks ago..."

Jackson's heart was breaking. "Aaron, please – please just look at me" he begged.

Aaron shook his head. "No"

"Look, I know I should have told you but it wasn't your problem babe, he was mine, he should not have included you in this"

Aaron turned to face him quickly. "Yeah damn right you should have! Do you have any idea how hurtful that is? You can't trust me Jackson that just proves it"

Jackson was shaking his head now. "NO, Aaron, just listen"

"I think I've heard enough, I could have died last night and you only decided to go to the police yesterday!" Aaron was raging.

"Please don't get worked up, you've not long been off the ventilator"

"I don't care!" Aaron retorted.

"I thought I could find him and sort it out Aaron, I didn't want him hurting you; he was spying on you to get at me"

"So you said" Aaron turned away again.

"I did it because I care about you, I love you for god sake, and can't you just at least see that?"

"Yes..." Aaron sighed.

"I love you so much Aaron, I can't and don't want to live without you - I never asked for this to happen, I never made it happen" he cried in his hands.

Aaron turned around, he knew the man he loved was being honest with him and he hadn't seen him being so upset and crying like he was before. "Jackson I love you, I know you didn't make this happen or asked for it too" he sighed. "It-" Aaron stopped.

Jackson sat up on the edge of his chair and placed his hand over Aaron's cheek lovingly. "Go on..."

"It was horrible; I never imagined what hell looked like until I was in it..." Aaron stared as he relived that night in his head. "I couldn't really see anything, except the smoke but my eyes stung too much after too long it was really really hard, I couldn't touch anything, I remember the heat from downstairs coming through my shoes, the sweat dripping, it was like I was melting" Aaron shivered.

"Don't think about it..." Jackson soothed him.

Aaron reached for Jackson and lifted himself up and they both moved closer to each other and their lips locked passionately. "It's not your fault" he whispered as their lips parted.

Jackson cried and rested his head on Aaron's shoulder. "I couldn't have imagined not being able to kiss you again"

Aaron wrapped his arms tightly around his man. "Heyy, you'll make me cry in a minute, I have a reputation you know" he chuckled as he spoke, the emotion evident.

Jackson laughed and pulled away and looked at him and wiped his tears away. "I think that reputation has gone to pot mister"

Aaron raised an eyebrow then shrugged. "As long as I've got you, I don't care"

Jackson smiled.

"Who got me out babe?" Aaron asked.

"Me..." he said apprehensively.

Aaron's mouth opened in shock. "Jackson! Why? You could have been hurt" he reprimanded.

"Because you're my world Aaron, someone had to do something, bloody fireman didn't look they were moving anywhere fast, so – I did, Declan stopped me at first but then I lost him in the crowd and then I just made a run for it as fast as I could to the house, avoided the fire-fighters. I wasn't letting you die in there, not a chance." He shook his head.

Aaron wouldn't admit it but his heart crumbled at what Jackson had just said. "Thank you" he managed to say before he began crying.

Jackson held him in a tight hug. "Were you hurt?" he heard Aaron ask.

"Just a few burns on my arms, a cut on my hand, nothing major – I wasn't really thinking of myself when I was in that house Aaron" he told him as he looked him in the eyes.

"Well you should have been, because when I can get out this bed and I'm on my crutches..." he frowned down at his ankle. "Don't remember doing that but anyway, your arse is getting whipped"

"Ohh Aaron Livesy I do love it when you talk dirty" Jackson smirked, so did Aaron. "It's a small price to pay for having you safe" he added.

Aaron smiled at him.

"Oh crap!" Jackson jumped up. "I said I'd ring your mum, when you'd woken, she's gone into town to get you some clothes to see you over until the house is back to normal"

"Well I think she'll understand me wanting to speak to my boyfriend before the clan arrive" he laughed. "And...I'm glad we did" he smiled.

Jackson nodded in agreement.

Aaron breathed in sharply. "Paddy?"

"It's alright...Paddy's fine, he's just worried about you"

Aaron nodded. "Okay...go on then sexy...go and call my mum..." he smiled.

Jackson nodded with a smile and left Aaron alone in the room. It was when he was completely alone that the actual horror of the night replayed fully and it haunted him. He stopped his pretence and relaxed, he was not okay; he wouldn't forget the feeling of being not trusted by Jackson because that's how it seemed. The fire would never go out, it would burn within him forever and when he winced in pain he realised he'd probably be scarred in some places and those too would never fade.

To Be Continued...


	12. 12 I Need You

"I Need You"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Sometimes, The Truth Hurts_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

"Stop fussing!" Aaron snapped at Paddy, his mum and Jackson and waved his free arm to signal space.

"Alright keep ya cast on" Jackson laughed and they all watched him get into the car with little trouble.

Chas smirked. "Impressive kid got it down already" she winked and walked round to the front of the car and climbed in the passenger seat and Jackson walked round aswell and got in beside Aaron. Paddy started the car and they were off, away from the hospital. _Thank God _Aaron thought.

While they drove away, Paddy gave Chas a concerned look and she nodded subtly, agreeing with him. Aaron was too quiet for their liking, which was understandable, but they actually preferred moody Aaron any day. Moody Aaron was predictable, Quiet Aaron was not.

Aaron was sat looking out of the window with his arm on the tiny ledge where the window was, and his hand rested under his chin. He watched as they drove through Hotten back to Emmerdale.

"You okay?" Jackson asked him.

Aaron just mumbled, not turning to face him.

Jackson nodded to himself. This wasn't going to be easy. But at the end of the day, what did he expect? Aaron might have talked about the ex with him and that entire situation but Jackson guessed that the trust issue was the second problem to deal with along with his psychological trauma, which came first.

When Paddy drove into Emmerdale, Aaron saw the house; he couldn't help but see it; as he looked all he saw was flames. Stopping outside Jackson's they all got out of the car, Aaron again rejected help as Jackson offered. Hazel came out and walked to them and gave Aaron a very gentle hug, he had no choice in the matter "Oh darling, I'm so happy you're okay"

"Thanks" Aaron speech was very monotone.

"Right then..." Chas looked at her son with love in her eyes. "Jacksons got the stuff I bought you...Paddy's staying with Marlon, and you know where we are, whatever hour"

Aaron frowned and nodded.

"Oh! Almost forgot..." she held out a bag. "The burn cream, antibiotics and whatever other drugs they've given you" she smiled.

Aaron balanced on his crutches for a second long enough to take the bag then put it in his mouth and held it there with his teeth and started making his way into the house, without a word.

"Be patient" Paddy smiled.

"I've apologised I don't know how many times and he's says its fine and all that, but acts like this? I know it's the fire aswell but I dunno" Jackson shook his head. "He won't let me touch him, won't talk, I feel horrible as it is, if I could I'd switch places in a second"

"I know love" Chas nodded sympathetically. "He just needs time"

Jackson nodded. "Right then, I'll go see to him" he said and walked into the house rather disheartened as he left his mum to talk to them.

Jackson walked into the kitchen to find Aaron filling a glass with water, a box of medication in his mouth while keeping his balance. "I could have done that for you" Jackson said.

Aaron shook his head. "I'm not an invalid" he replied bluntly.

"I know you're not but you're not exactly in good shape to be doing that" he advised.

Aaron turned and just looked at him. _I wouldn't go there if I were you _He thought.

Jackson caught the message embedded in his look. "I'll be in the living room" he said and walked out.

Hazel noted the sour look on his face as he threw himself on the couch. "Just don't mum" he warned calmly, seeing that she was about to speak.

Hazel nodded. _Ok then _she thought.

Aaron shook his head as he rested himself against the kitchen bench, took out the tablet and pierced the film cover and took out two, threw them in his mouth and picked up the glass and drank the water.

When Hazel walked into the kitchen, he came out of his stare. "Is it ok if I go upstairs and have a sleep?" he asked.

Hazel nodded her head. "Of course it is darling, do you want a hand?" she asked.

Aaron shook his head. "No, I'll be alright"

"If you're sure" she replied and watched him go, she placed his glass in the dishwasher and stood; thoughtful.

When Aaron got to the bottom of the stairs, he leaned himself back onto the fourth stair up, moved one crutch to the same side and he held them both in one hand, and with his free arm and free leg he pushed himself up the stairs. He probably could have done it an easier way but he really didn't have the energy to think of how or the strength to probably jump up them. He was doing this himself, he didn't want help. Aaron soon managed to get into the bedroom and fell back onto the bed and lied down, soon falling asleep, the struggling and the combined drugs exhausted him.

No longer than ten minutes later, Jackson slammed the TV remote down onto the space on the couch beside him. Stood up and grabbed his van keys from the coffee table and headed for the door. "Hey! Where you going?" Hazel called.

"Out, I'm not needed here am I?" he yelled before slamming the front door with force.

It was dark when Aaron woke, he frowned, Jackson hadn't been anywhere near him, he could just tell. He sighed as he pushed himself into a sitting up position on the bed, he looked at the alarm clock it was just gone ten. He raised his eyebrows in surprise, he must have been exhausted to sleep all day; he remembered waking a few times but that was it. He heard the TV downstairs. He pulled himself up onto his crutches and headed out onto the landing. "Jackson?" he called out and waited.

He heard movement coming to the bottom of the stairs. It was Hazel. "Are you alright love? I've been checking on you all day..."

"Yeah I'm sorry, I think the medication or something..." he sighed.

"I know Aaron" she smiled. "Don't apologise, your meant to rest, that's what you've been doing, do you want a hand down?" she asked him.

Aaron shook his head. "No I'm alright" he smiled. "Where's Jackson?"

"Ahh, now that's a good question, he's been gone all day, and I know where he is..."she sighed. "But he's not answering his phone..."

"Where?" Aaron perked up.

"Think you better come down, and see, you're the only person who can get through to him Aaron, he doesn't feel needed and to be honest I can see why"

Aaron sighed. "Alright I'm coming"

As Aaron was making his way down the stairs again on his backside, he knew what Hazel meant, denying his own boyfriend permission to help or touch him on top of his guilt must make Jackson feel horrible. He had no idea how he was going to resolve this but he'd speak to him when he found him.

"Right I'm down" he told Hazel as he pulled on one shoe. Hazel walked back into the doorway. "Aaron love, why won't you let anyone help you?" she asked.

Aaron frowned and shrugged. "I'd just rather do things myself"

"And I think me and you both know that's a lie" she comforted. "You need to talk to him; he's at the house..."

Aaron seized up when word of the house was mentioned.

"You don't have to go in it love, just shout from outside, he'll hear you and trust me I know you can shout" she chuckled. "I remember that day; the entire village heard you arguing with my boy"

Aaron smirked and nodded. He got up again on his crutches. He let Hazel open the door for him. It was freezing; Aaron didn't put a jacket on. He made it to the gate and then set about on his way clicking away as the crutches hit the pavement as he headed up to Smithy cottage.

When he made it to the pub, Carl was heading home and Aaron grunted expecting some kind of remark. "Hey Aaron, you shouldn't be out, it's freezing!"

"I'm going to find Jackson"

"You want me to get your mum?"

Aaron scowled with a sigh. "No, just do one Carl" he shook his head; he hadn't stopped moving throughout that very limited conversation.

Aaron sighed as he stood outside the house, he could hear the noise he was making, and he could see the flood lights he'd obviously installed. He stood looking in still, numb, cold and disturbed. "Jackson!" he called out. "Come on mate its late" he sighed. "Please don't make me come in there" he begged which was unusual for Aaron. He didn't say those words as a threat he said them as a sort of warning to Jackson and if Jackson could hear he should understand him, anyone who heard that would. "Jackson!" He actually shouted this time, angrily. He sat down outside the house facing the village in temper, shivering from the cold and slight pains which he ignored.

Aaron heard the shuffling of feet which stopped behind him. "Aaron, what are you doing here?" Jackson asked.

"I came to speak to you" Aaron replied.

"At half ten at night?" Jackson asked.

Aaron turned and shot him a look. "Yes at half ten at night, strange isn't it? – I'm sorry" he shook his head. "I'm sorry..."

Jackson stepped out of the house and sat beside him. He was dirty, black soot all over his clothes, arms and several marks on his face. His cheeks were red from none stop work; he'd worked up a sweat. He shook his head. "No, it's alright, come on, let's get you home" Jackson sighed.

"No, we're not moving Jackson, we talk now or I sit here all night freezing to death, I don't care either way but I prefer the first option because talking no, I'm not good at it but after your mum told me she knew you were here and had been all day, that's when it hit me – you have to stop feeling responsible for this babe because I don't blame you" Jackson started to cry as Aaron spoke. He pushed himself up but fell back down; Jackson jumped up and caught him though.

"Aaron, I love you so much..." he held both of his hands at Aaron's side. "Let me help, please?"

It was really hard for Aaron; the fire had induced a very self conscious but unbreakable barrier around him which softened after seeing the guilt Jackson was going through, cleaning out the house all day, preparing for the work to get done. Aaron nodded and Jackson held him in his arms but was careful not to hurt him.

Aaron faltered when his strong arms wrapped around him, and he felt his body against his. "This Dave guy isn't your fault, you didn't make him start those letters, photos...the fire" Aaron whispered to him.

Jackson felt Aaron's warm breath on his shoulder as he spoke. "I know but I should have gone to the police sooner and the fact I wasn't here for you when you needed me the most, that's whats eating away at me"

"No babe, you WERE here for me when I needed you the most, you SAVED me"

Jackson's breath was shaky as more tears threatened to fall. "You risked yourself to save me?" Aaron looked up with a scrunched face. "Me? – Not many people would do that"

"You really have no idea how many people around here care do you?" Jackson looked into his watery deep blue eyes.

Aaron looked away shrugging slightly. "Everyone is just used to you Aaron" he smiled. "The way you speak to people, the moody attitude, that's just you, but what they don't see, is the most amazing man in the whole world"

Aaron let out a breath quickly and made a negative sound. "You are Aaron; to me anyway, they don't see how caring, kind and loving you are, but they know you are deep down that's why they just accept that other you." Jackson stopped and took a breath. "Just like right now you aren't letting me see the vulnerable, scared and panicked Aaron, this Aaron needs me..."

_I do _he admitted in his thoughts. That was the problem, he needed to say that to the man he loved, not think it.

"I won't just accept it and let you deal with this alone"

At that point Aaron looked back at him; Aaron's tears fell as his body shivered from the cold.

"I know how hard this is for you, although you won't have said it, but coming here, this close to the house, at night, same time roughly when it happened? You're so brave and strong you don't even realise it, I admire you Aaron"

Aaron cried silently.

"I was inside briefly but that was nowhere near long enough to understand your hurt, your trauma, your mind set even, but I can imaging somewhat, I was selfish today when I left you, I'm really sorry"

Aaron nodded accepting his apology."You really need to stop apologising though, promise me? If you apologise one more time for anything to do with the fire I'll have to scream and shout and whack you with a crutch or something"

Jackson pulled a wary face and pouted. "Ohhh that's not good..." he smirked. "I promise"

Aaron smiled and sighed. "When I look at the house I just see flames and the memories come flooding back, I'd never felt heat like it – everybody who gets close to me gets hurt, but this time it was me, I don't know why" he shrugged as he allowed the tears to fall.

"The end result if it had been allowed to happen would have hurt everyone Aaron so much"

"I know but it just makes me wonder if I'm meant to be happy with a normal life, it makes me wonder if I should even be here, because I don't let anyone in, and in the fire I couldn't get out, its gunna sound stupid I know but it was like the fire was trying to tell me something, like it was punishing me for those things" he chuckled and wiped his eyes. "Yeah, and how stupid do I sound right now?"

Jackson's eyes were red and full with tears which just kept falling. Aaron was talking. It was a start. "You sound like a man who hasn't had it easy, who doesn't know how to be himself, but you're being yourself now, with me, your letting me in, the fire wasn't an act of karma, I know the moody you and stuff will not disappear I'm not asking for that, I know you're not perfect, who is? But just let it out babe, I'm here for you, your my boyfriend and you have no idea how much I love you"

Aaron looked at him and sobbed, and Jackson grabbed him and pulled him into his arms. "You are meant to be here" Jackson cried. "Don't ever think that as for the punishing you, only you can do that"

"Right back at ya" Aaron chuckled, his voice muffled as he rested against Jackson's shoulder.

"I won't, I don't wanna push you away because of how I feel about all of this, it'll go in time, but I understand you don't blame me, thankyou" Jackson whispered.

Aaron tightened his grip around him. "Take me home?"

Jackson nodded and pulled away. "I'll just turn those lights off"

"Oh and as for the house...just don't do it all alone please? You have contacts, I've seen your list... you can get people in"

Jackson nodded as he walked into the house. "I will" he smiled.

Aaron waited in the chilling cold, shivering from head to toe. The village was quiet except the slight noise coming from the pub. He almost jumped when he felt an arm around his back. It was Jackson; he was thinking too much that he didn't hear him coming. "You're so brave" Jackson whispered and kissed Aaron on the head as they started to walk back to Dale head.

Aaron smiled, those were strange words to make him realise what love felt like. He let that feeling in and wasn't letting go of it. "I'd take you for a drink but you don't look all that good to be fair" Aaron smirked.

Jackson shook his head. "I know! I actually agree with you for once babe, are you hungry?" he asked.

"Hmm..." Aaron thought. "Yeah actually, been asleep all day, hope your mum doesn't mind..."

Jackson shook his head. "Nahh, she expected it" he smiled. "So food?"

"Indian" Jackson said and at the same time, Aaron said. "Chinese"

"Ok let's go in the middle then...pizza?" Jackson asked.

"Mmm..." Aaron's mind wandered off at the thought of it.

"I'll take that as yes then" Jackson laughed.

"Too right" Aaron nodded.

When they'd gotten home Jackson immediately ran a bath for Aaron – his shower could wait. He'd helped him into the bath, which Aaron found a little embarrassing but the words. "I've seen it all before anyway" with a frown from Jackson took that embarrassment away. The bath had to be just warm water, it was nowhere near hot, otherwise his burns would be really bad, but in fact they were anyway, it was quite traumatic actually, Aaron cried at the pain, and Jackson cried at seeing him like that. He was knelt down at the side of the bath. Aaron knew he had to keep them clean, and he let Jackson cover his upper back in the warm water. His broken ankle was out of the water. It took them a while to figure out how to actually do this whole bathing thing, Jackson fussed around him like an old woman, they were so disorganised, but it was adorable.

Jackson leaned over the side of the bath and kissed him on the lips softly. "It's alright babe" he soothed.

"It just hurts" Aaron winced.

"I know, I'll get you out and we'll get the solution they gave us on them, and then I'll put some cream on and cover them back up" Jackson told him and Aaron nodded. Just like Jackson had said earlier – that was the side of Aaron no one else saw, and under normal circumstances it was his loving side no one saw.

"Ugh" Aaron sounded. "I know..." he sighed. "Got to be done"

"You're right there" Jackson said as he stood up got the towel ready and helped him out of the bath.

Moments later, Aaron was sat with a towel around his waist on the edge of the bed, his back turned away from Jackson slightly allowing him to see the burns that needed the oil and cream around them. There was several, equally on each of his sides, small ones on one of his shoulders and lower neck and a rather big one on his lower back. There was one on one of his thighs aswell. Jackson placed the lids back on the cream and oil. And took out the cushioned plaster like bandage, they had tiny holes over the surface to still allow air into the wound.

Before he began placing them on, he put his hands on Aaron's arms and leaned forward and softly kissed his left shoulder which was free of burns. Jackson loved Aaron, it was clear to see, they needed that talk and it worked. Aaron equally loved him as much too and he hoped Jackson knew that, but he intended on making it clear anyway in some way or another.

To Be Continued...

I hope you guys are still enjoying these, please feel free to review I always appreciate and read what you guys think so thankyou, and thankyou for sticking with my stories!


	13. 13 Down And Out Part One

"Down And Out Part One"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on **1 MONTH **from _I Need You_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Please read: - This story which is the first of two is basically tying up loose ends and touches upon an issue which I will quickly resolve in part two, thanks for sticking with me guys, much appreciated. Reviews welcome!

Aaron and Jackson had just pulled up outside a lodge in the lakes, that Jackson rented for the week to treat his boyfriend, and to be honest Jackson needed the break aswell, after working constantly day in day out at Smithy. The interior decoration of the house was done, the re-wiring of most things and the external front wall was rebuilt, all it needed doing now to it was, new carpets, furniture, a new kitchen and a new front door.

Aaron stood next to Jackson when he was opening the boot to get their belongings out. Jackson spoke calmly. "You've changed babe"

This didn't really faze Aaron and he just looked at him. "I'm sorry I didn't realise I had to have reason too"

Jackson sighed. "Look, do you just wanna get back in the car and go home? I'm not being funny or nothing but I could do with a break aswell as you so don't go all mardy with me, and let's just enjoy our time away" Jackson sighed. "We don't often get time alone Aaron"

"Yeah I know, come on then" he huffed and grabbed a bag and walked up the steps to the door of their lodge.

While Jackson was unpacking the bathroom things, he sighed and pulled out a lot of medication of the same tablets in a prescription bag. He frowned and put them away and walked out back into the kitchen and living room area. "Aaron..."

"Oh what now Jackson?" he said as he threw some tablets in his mouth and took a drink.

Jackson raised an eyebrow at his attitude. "I thought you were off the tablets as of the other day?" he asked.

Aaron shook his head. "No, I was told to stick with them" he shrugged.

"Well you didn't need to bring that many boxes, we're only here a week"

"Yeah I did, I needed to make sure I had enough"

"Aaron-"

"No! Jackson seriously listen to me for once yeah, I'm just being cautious I don't wanna run out of them ok, leave it"

Jackson sighed and walked away. "Should have brought Dan instead"

Aaron shook his head. He just wasn't in the mood, and he knew why but Jackson didn't, but from that conversation; he was close to knowing but Aaron also knew his boyfriend wasn't stupid. Prescription drugs were as lethal as illegal drugs. "Alright then, gimme the keys" he sighed. "I'll piss off back home then, let you invite your fancy man..."

Jackson stopped in his tracks and shot back around. "Dan's just a mate and you know it, what the hell has gotten into you lately, you're like a psycho!"

"What like Dave?" he looked right in his eyes. "Best you just give me the keys Jackson" Aaron told him.

Jackson shook his head. "You are not driving my car! And how many times is this gunna happen, it's been like this most days since the fire! Your nasty to me then your fine, are you bipolar or something?"

"Ha, you're so funny you aren't ya!" Aaron shook his head and walked over to the sofa and sat down, pulled down a blanket that was hanging over the back of it and wrapped his entire body in it, up to his neck.

Jackson watched. He frowned, he knew something was definitely wrong now, his suspicions had been confirmed. He watched Aaron for another few seconds and his heart crumbled. _How do I help him with this? _He thought miserably and lowered his head as he left him alone.

Half an hour later Jackson walked back out and sat close to him, to which was received by a silent movement from Aaron where he rested his head on his boyfriends shoulder and Jackson put his arm around him. This proved Jackson's statement of being nasty one moment then fine the next.

Jackson leaned in closer and started kissing his head and when Aaron lifted up to look at him he kissed his neck softly. "Jackson no..." Aaron whispered.

"There's no one else in any of the other lodges babe, we can be as noisy as we want..." his voice oozing with passion.

"I said no Jackson" Aaron swiftly pulled away and walked to the bedroom, undressed and quickly dived into the cold bed and wrapped the covers up to his neck.

It was half two in the morning when Aaron bolted up right, dripping in sweat and was in a complete panic with himself and Jackson woke, startled at first but then realised what was happening; what happened every night since the fire. Jackson tried to soothe him. "No! Don't touch me! I need to get out of here" Aaron scrambled off the bed and pulled on the clothes he was wearing that day.

"Aaron! What the hell? For god sakes talk to me!" Jackson pleaded.

Aaron laughed. "Talk to you? You couldn't even begin to comprehend what I've been through! Now I'm leaving this lodge, whether you like it or not, I've had enough Jackson I can't TAKE it anymore!"

Jackson, all the while was rushing to get his clothes on "Why? What makes you feel like that? Me? The prescription tablets you think I'm blinded by"

Aaron sighed and let the bedroom door slam as he bolted out into the living area and adjoining kitchen and ran for the double doors. The instant cold hitting him immediately, it was an ice cold breeze which chilled him to the bone. He shivered as he ran along the ground to the small lake pier which extended out several metres out into the water, Aaron approached the edge slowly. His eyes widened as he realised what he was doing. It was dark, he could only just see the edge of the wood panel, and he could hear the water flapping. There was a full moon but the clouds were hiding it. Was this what he wanted? Or was he being medically influenced?

To Be Continued...


	14. 14 Down And Out Part Two

"Down And Out Part Two"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on **directly **from _Down And Out Part One _

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

The high winds had moved the clouds on their way and as Jackson caught up, light was now shed on his predicament. _Oh God _he panicked instantly and ran closer to the pier and walked on it slowly. "Aaron..." he spoke calmly as he slowly approached.

"Go away Jackson" Aaron spoke quietly.

"Oh yeah because I'm going to leave my boyfriend on the edge of a pier who's obviously ready to dive in"

"Why do you always do that?" Aaron asked and turned his head slightly to one side, although not facing Jackson.

"Do what?" Jackson asked, not knowing what he meant.

"Make light of it like it's something fucking hilarious when it's not!"

Jackson jaw slightly dropped and he felt heartache at those words, he couldn't believe Aaron thought that. "Babe" he sighed. "I haven't, I know it's hard, and I know what you're doing with the medicine"

"I'm not doing anything"

"Well maybe you don't realise you are but it has to stop now, it can hurt you and I don't want an addict as a boyfriend because that's what you'll become if you don't do something about it now"

Aaron turned around. "An addict?" he scowled.

"Yes!" Jackson raised his voice.

"Oh come on, I might be many things but an addict is not one of them"

Jackson became frustrated. "You're deluding yourself, I know as well as you do that you should have came off them weeks ago"

Aaron sighed. "Yeah ok, you're right" he wasn't fighting anymore. "I need them Jackson; they help me through the days"

"I don't?" he asked. "I try but you don't let me anywhere near you? And this covering up business, what's that all about?" he asked.

"Do you want me to spell it out for you?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah actually, I do" Jackson replied.

"Alright then you've been so wrapped up in that bloody house that you can't see how self conscious I' am, has the fact that I've said no to anything physical since not sprung sort of alarm in your head?" he asked. "No, because all you want is sex" that wasn't true but that was his vicious mood at the moment. "And that house, you might be able to get it all nice for Paddy but if you think I'm going back there you've got another thing coming, I'd rather be dead"

"You don't mean that" Jackson told him.

"Oh don't I?" he stepped closer to the edge.

"Aaron, babe, please, just step back from the edge and we can talk properly, have this out once and for all"

"What good is that going to do?" he asked.

"It'll help you, this isn't all my fault you know maybe if you talked more it would help you come to terms with all this" Jackson sighed. "You need to embrace what happened to you now, not reject it because rejecting it does this, the medicine problem we can get sorted when we get home but this is up to you babe, I know it was horrible for you but you have to let me in again, and you have no need to feel self conscious"

"But I do Jackson..."

"Do you know what your scars say to me? They are reminder that I nearly lost the love of my life and they're also a reminder that I can never ever lose you, I love you too much to let that happen, I'm here for you Aaron, I have been since the day we met, I know it's been a rollercoaster since but there's nothing either of us can do about that except move on and deal with it, I don't care if my boyfriend has scars, they're apart of you, your still here and that's the main thing, you still look as handsome as ever"

Aaron cried. "What if I disgust you?" he thought.

Jackson stepped closer. "Aaron, come here..." Jackson held out his arms.

Aaron turned around.

"Let me Aaron?" Jackson spoke quietly, looking into his amazing eyes which he loved so much.

Aaron stood breaking down and Jackson caught him before he faltered to his knees.

"You're safe with me, always, I'm sorry I've been so busy with the house, and ignored your feelings, I guess I've just been burying my guilt into the house"

"I know I'm safe with you, I'll get help before it gets out of control I promise"

Jackson kissed his head. "I know, I believe you, but this fire, it's in the past, you lived" he smiled. "Be grateful and live your life"

Aaron nodded and looked into his eyes. "Live with me?" he asked.

Jackson frowned. "We already kinda do" he chuckled.

"No I mean properly, just me and you, our own place, to start a fresh, a new life, do what normal couples do cause I don't think you'll argue the fact that we haven't exactly been stereotypical" he laughed slightly.

"Okay then but this is a conversation to be taken inside" he smiled. Aaron agreed and walked with his boyfriend back to the lodge.

Once back they locked the door, settled in front of the fire with a cup of hot chocolate each, it was cosy both of them had to admit.

Jackson smirked. "Is this what you meant by stereotypical?"

"Hmm...Closer yeah" he smiled. "I just meant like normal things you know, no drama"

Jackson nodded. "I know what you mean" he placed his hand over his.

Aaron smiled then looked thoughtful. "I'm so sorry babe; I dunno what came over me before"

"The past did, but just remember what I said, it's a part of you, don't push it away, you're alive" Jackson placed his hand on Aaron's cheek. "That's all that matters"

"I couldn't leave you!" Aaron grinned. "Never, not a chance! And I mean that. I'm really sorry"

Jackson nodded.

"Will you do me a favour? Throw those pills away?" Aaron asked.

Jackson smiled and nodded as he got up. "Sure"

Aaron was now alone, and the crackling of the fire was now more prominent. He hesitated at first, but then found the acceptance within him and turned to stare his worst nightmare in the face and momentarily his lips curled into a smile.

When Jackson returned, Aaron couldn't believe he didn't see it before. He kneeled up onto his knees as Jackson settled back down; Aaron put his arm around his neck and pulled him in closer and kissed him with a deep passion. "What's this for?" Jackson smiled. "I never realised it before" Aaron breathed.

"What babe?" they both gazed at each other.

"How much you've changed my life" he became tearful.

Jackson's smile was wide. "Hey, don't cry" Jackson leaned forward again and kissed him. As they kissed Aaron leaned back and started to slowly move to the floor, he felt Jackson's arm supporting him so he didn't hit the floor. Their lips were locked and weren't parting anytime soon...

To Be Continued...


	15. 15 The Realisation Of Change Needed

"The Realisation Of Change Needed"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Down And Out Part Two_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Aaron was lying in bed, squirming slightly and giggling, the quilt came up just short of his shoulders. Then he groaned "Jackson..."

His body was warm as he wrapped his arms around him as he pulled him up. Jackson licked his lips when he resurfaced from under the duvet. "You're a dirty bastard" Aaron told him with a smirk.

"Well you weren't complaining all week when we were away..." Jackson was breathless; Aaron could feel his heart racing as their chests were pressed together.

"Nope, I know" Aaron grinned. "But you've had your fair share aswell" he smirked as he leaned up and kissed him."Mmmm...Right come on are we going out or not?"

"Yes, we are" Jackson sighed. "Get ready then, I need to ring Ryan, see if he's been able to get in touch with his mum about the house" Jackson said as he leaned over to the bedside table and grabbed his phone.

Aaron rolled out of bed naked and walked over to the wardrobe to get out some clothes. Jackson was distracted when the call connected. His man was hot!

Aaron left Jackson in the room talking to Ryan on the phone, while he went for his shower.

The bathroom was steamed up from the hot water which was covering every inch of Aaron's body, he didn't hear the door open, and Jackson stepped in seconds later, startling Aaron. "Room for one more?" he asked before kissing his neck and shoving him up against the shower screen.

"Always" Aaron replied with a deep moaning sigh.

The bar was bustling with life; the music was loud but not too loud so people couldn't hear each other. Aaron and Jackson had been there a few hours now, they'd played pool a few times, and much to Aaron's annoyance, Jackson caught up with Dan, who he hadn't seen in a while. He didn't like Jackson's friends, because he knew they didn't approve of him but they let it go for Jackson's sake. "I'll go to the bar" Aaron smiled and got up from the sofa, leaving Jackson alone.

When he'd ordered the drinks Aaron turned around, resting his elbows on the bar, and stood looking around while he waited. While his eyes met his and Jacksons table their good night turned sour, he turned back around and picked up the drinks, stormed over to the table, slammed the drinks down, grabbed Jackson's keys from the table, putting them in his pocket immediately. "Not a good move Jackson, I'm not even ten metres away and there you are getting all cosy" he laughed. "You know what you're something else you are, you know what I've been like lately and you do this, well he can have my pint, I've had enough!"

Jackson frowned. "You're not driving the van! For one you're over the limit and you're not insured" he sighed as Aaron stormed off. "Ahh sorry mate" Jackson got up running after him.

Outside in the rain, Jackson caught up with Aaron, who was in the driver's seat, he ran round to the door and opened it and dragged him out rather violently. "Passenger side now! What the hell do you think you're doing!"

Aaron was raging, and he just glared at him.

"Now Aaron, we're going home"

Aaron breathed heavily and walked to the passenger side and got in slamming the door.

Most of the drive was silent until Jackson started talking quietly. "I dunno what's up with you Aaron, we had an amazing week away once we got through the problems in the first few hours, I just don't get you sometimes..."

"And I don't get you, you think you're all that don't ya, flirting away, I saw it with my own eyes, and I'm not stupid!"

"Flirting?"He frowned. "No Aaron, it was Dan's mate, I was being friendly!"

"A little too friendly for my liking" Aaron retorted.

Jackson sighed and tightened his grip on the steering wheel in frustration.

"Stop the van" Aaron demanded.

"No, we're going home"

"I said STOP THE VAN!"

"For god sake Aaron!" Jackson put his foot on the brake and the van slowed and eventually came to a halt, he put the van into neutral and pulled up the handbrake.

Aaron opened the door quickly and walked in front of the van, his hands at his waists, getting drenched in the down pour. Jackson left the engine running and got out too, and walked up to him, in his mind he was set to try a different approach in calming his boyfriend.

"Is this how it's going to be?" Jackson asked quietly.

Aaron turned and looked at him and shrugged.

"Yeah because that's real mature" Jackson replied. "Why did you do that?"

"Because the man I love was flirting with another guy" Aaron cried. "I knew I was never good enough for you, the looks I get from oh so special Dan and his mates remind me every time I'm out with you"

"I WASN'T FLIRTING!" Jackson yelled, now at his wits end with Aaron's behaviour. He took a breath. "And you are good enough, I wouldn't spend every day with you or trying to organise a house for us to rent! And don't even dare bring up the self conscious issues again, I know that doesn't go away over night, I know that I'm not stupid" Jackson explained as he moved closer to him. It was a good sign he thought, because Aaron wasn't moving away.

But Aaron was still raging inside. "No, you're right it doesn't, but there's Dan and his mates, all perfect, probably haven't done a thing wrong in their lives, so why? Why on gods earth do you want some troubled chav?"

Jackson frowned.

"Well I'm just saying what people think" Aaron shrugged.

Jackson then placed his head in his hands. "Grr" he sounded in frustration. While he was doing this Aaron bolted for the van, he couldn't stay there any longer, he would have said something he regretted, and his heart was pounding with anger.

Jackson turned around instantly at the sound of him running to the van. "Aaron!" he yelled and chased after him, but Aaron was fast and had a head start.

When Jackson got to the van Aaron had locked the doors and he put the van into gear, dropped the hand brake and accelerated away quickly.

"Oh shit!" Jackson panicked. He grabbed his phone and started ringing Aaron. Aaron had placed his phone on the passenger seat and he saw it light up and heard the vibrations but he ignored it. As he drove, his eyes streamed with tears from the feelings of not being good enough, and the fear that he would never be. He loved Jackson but he'd rather him be happy. His attention was diverted again when the phone vibrated again and lit up. Jacksons name coming up on the screen.

He looked down at it and wiped his eyes with his sleeve at the same time. When he looked back up to the road his eyes widened and he pulled the steering wheel to the right harshly, and slammed on the brakes.

Jackson could hear the screech of the tyres on the road. His heart skipped a beat and he began running, his breathing heavy as he raced to his lover, everything seemed to fall silent. All he could really hear was the rain pouring down and his own footsteps.

The van almost slammed into the back of a lorry but now the brakes had locked and the van was sliding along the wet road and the back end of the van hit a tree which caused Aaron to bounce around at the wheel and he whacked his head off the window when the van came to an abrupt stop.

To Be Continued...


	16. 16 Onwards And Upwards?

"Onwards And Upwards?"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _The Realisation Of Change Needed_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Jackson was running so fast as placed his hands out in front of him to stop him when he hit the van, his breathing was erratic and he quickly pulled open the driver side door and Aaron started sliding out, blood was pouring down his face from the glass he'd smashed his head into. Jackson panicked but was mad at Aaron once he'd realised he hadn't worn a seatbelt.

Jackson held him in his arms and ran round to the passenger side and sat him on the seat, putting the seatbelt around him. As Jackson slammed the door shut Aaron started to come around. The van had a bump in the back end and the left light unit was smashed. But it was driveable.

Aaron winced in pain and immediately moved his hand to touch where it hurt the most and he felt the blood. He was aware they were driving and then he was aware of a hand shaking him.

"Hey babe, it's alright, just try and stay awake, can you do that?" Jackson asked.

Aaron groaned. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" he said, his eyes trying to close.

"Just forget about that now and stay awake for me - Aaron!" he shouted, grabbing his attention.

The next morning Jackson pulled up outside Dale Head and walked to Aaron's side and helped him out the van and within seconds Hazel, Paddy and Chas stepped out the front door, all wearing the same conspicuous look. Jackson frowned when he saw them. "Where the hell have you two been?" Chas asked with a yell.

"Hazel said you two didn't come home, your mums been worried sick Aaron" Paddy frowned. "Aaron you alright mate?" Paddy asked as he noted the stitches on his forehead.

"Yeah...fine" he frowned.

"What the hell happened this time?" Chas asked.

"Well...funny story really"

"Aaron..." Jackson shook his head, stopping him before he could make light of this.

"Alright, I was drunk, I got mad, I took Jackson's van and I hit a tree, whacked my head, and spent all night in A and E" Aaron smiled and then walked into the house, leaving the three adults shocked.

Chas looked at Paddy. "Nahh..." she chuckled.

"No actually Chas" Jackson was stood with his hands in his pockets. "For once your son is actually telling the truth"

"I'm gunna kill him" Chas replied shaking her head in disbelief, but then actually what else would she expect, it was Aaron.

"He's alright though, that fire just did a little more damage than we thought, but I'm trying with him" Jackson told her and Chas nodded thankfully.

Jackson walked into the house and found Aaron in the kitchen; he walked up behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist. "We've got an appointment to view the house, you still interested aren't you?" Jackson asked.

Aaron nodded as he stuffed his face with a jammie dodger. "Mmm hmmm" he sounded as he nodded his head.

"Good, cause there's nothing I want more" Jackson told him. "I mean it aswell Aaron, I know we had a long talk last night in the hospital but I just wanna be sure you heard everything I said"

Aaron nodded and turned around as he swallowed the biscuit. "I did" he nodded. "I'm all you want" he smiled and Jackson nodded. "Correct"

"Good, that's sorted then"

Aaron moved in to kiss him and Jackson pulled away. "Eww, jam breath!" he ran away playfully as he started laughing and Aaron grabbed the tee towel and he just managed to whip his backside.

A while later after freshening up and a very quiet playful session, well after all Aaron did have some making up to do. Both lads were changed and headed out of the house and headed to the house, meeting the letting agent there to show them around. Once inside they were both impressed and after seeing the master bedroom, they both had a smirk on their face. It was a whole lot bigger than what either of them were used too. Aaron had never imagined meeting someone like Jackson several months ago, and in actual fact loving him eventually and now this it just made him happy, aside from the obvious troubles they had of late.

When they walked back downstairs they were chatting away.

"So, what do you think?" the agent asked.

Jackson nodded and looked at Aaron, who was nodding also. "We like it, but there is a few things that need doing but my man here is a builder so, I guess I'm sorted there" Aaron grinned.

"Yeah on ya bike" Jackson laughed, but Aaron knew he was joking.

The agent smiled.

"We'll take it" Aaron said.

Jackson was shocked; he had not expected that – he let out a surprised laugh which he stopped quickly. "What?" he looked at him.

Aaron frowned. "Well why not? I have money saved believe it or not, I mean come on, I only go to the pub, or bar west occasionally, so I don't really waste my money and plus with both our wages combined, we can keep up with the rent and bills..."

Jackson smiled in complete shock, Aaron Livesy being a grown up who'd have thought? Jackson knew that this was a big step for Aaron but a step he obviously wanted and was comfortable with and so was he. He nodded again. "Yeah we'll take it" he smiled.

The agent smiled. "Right then, if you could both sign this, I can begin all the necessary checks but with you having both filled in the forms I shouldn't see why we can't have the keys to you by the end of the week"

"Excellent" Jackson smiled as he took the sheet and a pen and signed where he needed too and Aaron did the same and handed it back.

"Had a bump there kid?" the agent asked.

Aaron didn't know what he was talking about at first. "Oh yeah, had a accident when we were in the van"

"Oh well make sure he's looking after you then" he smiled as they all headed for the door.

"He is" Aaron smiled. "Dunno what I'd do without him"

Jackson smiled and put his arm around him.

"Right then Mr. Walsh, Mr Livesy, I'll be in touch in a few days" the agent smiled and locked the door to the house.

"Speak to you then" Jackson smiled before they both headed back to the house.

Upon walking back in, his mother pounced. "How was it then?" she asked.

"Yeah, good mum" he smiled.

"Yeah we like it, said we'd take it, should have the keys by the end of the week"

"Ohh I'm so happy for you both" Hazel replied as she pulled them both into a hug.

"What will I do without you both though?" she wondered.

"You'll be throwing parties and all sorts don't kid yourself" Jackson smirked.

"Now that's an idea!" she smiled and walked off. "You boys hungry?"

"Erm no thanks Hazel I better get to work" Aaron told her.

"Work? But you're not working today..."

Aaron nodded. "I' am babe, got a van to fix again, although the first time we met, it wasn't actually my fault, but this time it is so I'm off and I'll see you tonight"

Jackson walked to the door with him and kissed him. "I love you"

"I love you too Mr. Walsh, oh get practising, tea on the table and all that yeah?" he winked and smirked, his cheeky grin was adorable.

Jackson laughed and shook his head gently and watched him walk around the corner to the garage.

To Be Continued...


	17. 17 Final Showdown

"Final Showdown"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Onwards And Upwards?_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

**-Right Guys I' am definitely tying up loose ends :D Enjoy! You might not like what Jackson does but for a man who's been pushed and pushed...well you might understand?**

Aaron and Jackson had been sat in the pub since five, it was now seven. "Oh crap! I forgot to get those measurements to email off to the guys"

"Can it not wait till the morning?" Aaron asked.

"No babe, not unless you wanna wait longer to move in?" he asked.

Aaron shook his head. "No chance, hurry back then" he smiled as Jackson leaned in and kissed him.

"I will" he said as he looked at the bar seeing Adam. "And anyway Adam can keep you company till I get back" he smiled and Adam turned around.

"Yeah why not? Been a while hasn't it mate?"

Aaron nodded as Adam walked over and sat beside him.

"Right then see you boys soon" he smiled and threw on his jacket as he walked through the doors of the pub. It was dark, and there was no breeze whatsoever; he walked down the village and unlocked his van. He opened the back doors and rummaged around for a tape measure and his file.

Jackson approached the empty house and unlocked the door and walked in, he was only going to be a few minutes so he left the door open, and ran upstairs to do what he needed to do, when he walked to the final room and took his measurements he was stood at the window sill writing them down when an almighty bang echoed through the house. Jackson froze, he remembered how calm it was outside, nothing natural could have caused that, and within seconds he heard a set of clumps on the wood floors, and then one by one they became louder but were moving very slowly. Jackson panicked and decided that if someone wanted him they would have called out to him on arrival. But there was nothing but the chilling sounds of the slow footsteps rising up the stairs.

Jackson was still frozen and actually scared, he even tried to stop his breath it was so loud to him that he thought it would draw attention. The footsteps stopped outside the room; he didn't turn around.

"Alright Jackson?" came the chilling voice of Dave, who was standing in the doorway holding a crow bar.

Jackson slowly turned around to confront his crazed ex. He swallowed hard, and immediately saw the effect life had on him. He was now a mere shadow of the person Jackson once knew and thought he loved. "Took your time to show up?" Jackson said surprisingly bravely.

"Well...had to wait to get you alone, that boy doesn't let you out of his sight does he? I mean after all, I thought I finished him off - shame" he sighed. "I'll do a better job next time"

"There won't be a next time" Jackson replied.

"Oh I think you're mistaken Jackson, no one gets to have you, not after what you did to me"

Jackson frowned. "Excuse me? What I did to you? I didn't do a thing and you know it, awww I walked out, how terrible for you! You don't beat up someone for months on end who you supposedly love, you never let me out, never let me call anyone, you took over my life, and you know what, the day I did actually find the strength to leave when you went out, was a wakeup call for me! You sick twisted bastard!"

"I'm not!" Dave raged.

"So this is normal is it? Creeping into an empty house with a crow bar, threatening me and Aaron, who I might add I love to bits" Jackson laughed, this felt exhilarating. "I never loved you, you were the starter for the main course which is Aaron and he is worth a million of you - you wouldn't even be able to begin to understand how much, because you haven't got a loving bone in your body!"

Dave's expression was evil and nasty.

"And as for the fire, you're going to pay for that"

"Oh and how so?" he asked.

"I haven't decided yet, maybe I could strike a match and light you" Jackson threatened.

"You wouldn't get close enough!" Dave shouted.

"Scared are we?" Jackson asked. "Why you scared of me? Because I've toughened up a lot more since you hmmm" Jackson walked over to him, very closely, to which Dave reacted by raising his crow bar. "Go on, hit me, and add another offense onto your list..." Jackson egged him on.

In the pub Adam and Aaron were sat talking like good old times. "I never thought I'd ever see you settle down..." Adam said.

Aaron laughed. "Yeah me either, but I love him and that's a big thing for me to say you'll agree?" he said.

Adam nodded. "Definitely mate, I'm proud of you, I really am"

Aaron nudged him. "Ahh getting soppy are we?" he chuckled.

"Yeah well since the fire, I've come to realise there are times when it's necessary" Adam said with a smile.

Aaron nodded with a smile, in complete understanding.

"What's Jackson doing again?" Adam asked.

"He's just measuring up some stuff for the house" he answered.

"Taking some time innit?" he asked.

"Hmm, yeah..." Aaron frowned. "I'll wait a bit, and then I'll give him a ring"

Back at the house Dave and Jackson had broken out into a fight, on the landing. Dave's crow bar had struck Jackson's shoulder, but he kept kicking him away. He eventually kicked the crow bar out of his hand and it fell to the floor with a big clanging sound. Now all Dave had was his fists, which Jackson was already well acquainted with. "Come on then, you're here now Dave, might aswell make the most of me!" Jackson shouted.

"This wasn't how I wanted it!" he screamed.

"Oh so what? You thought I would just come crawling back to you, never in a million years, you hurt Aaron so badly, you've scarred him, but you also scarred him on the inside, he tries to hide it but I can see it, and it kills me just that little bit more each morning when I wake up next to him or during the night when I'm soothing him after the nightmares, I felt guilty every day, but not now, you know why because it all boils down to you losing it once I'd left and I'm not going to feel bad for ever leaving you, it saved me and it brought me to Aaron! I hope to god that churns your stomach!" Jackson laughed. "Aarons alive that's all I care about and you are going down for this!"

Dave raged and lunged himself at Jackson, his fists pounding Jacksons face, neck, chest anywhere his fists impacted.

Blood splattered from Jackson's nose as he was beaten, but if this was the small price to pay for a fresh start, no it wasn't nice but Jackson was willing to take it. He did fight back though, Jackson managed to grab him by the collar and push him to the top of the stairs.

Dave realised what Jackson was doing and laughed. "You think that will kill me? I doubt it and plus you haven't got it in you" his tone was vicious.

Jackson pushed him away with force and watched him fall down the few steps to the bottom, he was right, it wouldn't kill him. "Better for me then" Jackson breathed and followed him down where Dave was groaning in pain. "Oh trust me, when someone hurts the man I love and threatens them, I'll do what it takes to protect them – you're finished Dave, I'm calling the police" Jackson walked off but his phone rang and he answered it – it was Aaron.

"Hi" his voice shaky, all the while he kept watch on Dave. "Erm no not really, I need you to come to the house, please, quickly..." he began to cry. "No babe just hurry" he ended the call and proceeded to call the emergency services.

Moments later, Aaron burst through the front door with Adam; they both saw Jackson straight away and the blood on his face. "Oh my god" Aaron breathed and Jackson just flung his arms around him.

"Mate what the hell happened?" Adam asked.

"Dave...he knew I was alone and..."

Aaron shivered from head to toe when he heard his name and when he actually saw a body slumped at the bottom of the stairs he jumped out of Jackson's arms and froze.

"Dave?" Adam asked.

"The ex, he started the fire" Aaron's eyes were wide.

"Aaron, babe, it's alright – we got into a fight, I pushed him, he's not dead I checked..." he sighed, much to his dismay.

"Well he should be!" Aaron yelled and walked quickly to him and started kicking him violently, his revenge, what little he could have was done and he felt so much better for it.

Adam and Jackson didn't stop him, if Aaron had an idea or something got into his head which he needed to do there was no stopping him. Jackson silently hoped this would heal Aaron.

When the sirens were heard, Aaron stepped away ready for them coming in and held Jackson. The police came in first and then the paramedics. Within thirty minutes all statements had been taken, and Dave had been finally arrested for arson and attempted murder. The police saw no need to further their enquiry into what had happened there tonight, Jackson was acting on self defence in his property and the law had no jurisdiction under these circumstances and left the men to move on.

Dave was gone, and would never bother them again.


	18. 18 Fulfilled Desires

"Fulfilled Desires"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Final Showdown_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

_**This might come out of the blue, i know that but since I haven't followed this particular characters life in the time of these Aarson stories, who knows what goes on so, enjoy hopefully! Reviews welcome as always. **_

Jackson sighed loudly as he sat up in bed. "Aaron! Get up now!"

Aaron turned on his back to face him and scowled at his boyfriend. "No, I've got a really bad head and you aren't doing it any favours, and you can't say its self inflicted cause I didn't have any drink last night, so shut up" Aaron was defensive and he sighed when he finished speaking then put the pillow over his head this time.

"Want me to suffocate you while you're there?" Jackson mumbled with a shake of his head and got out of bed.

"Ohh Jackson" Aaron sighed, he felt bad now, but he wasn't getting up to run after him.

Moments later Jackson walked back into the bedroom and Aaron was asleep. He was adorable when he slept all calm and peaceful – until he woke up that was but he loved Aaron regardless. Jackson pulled the cover back and slid back in the warm bed with his man and cuddled up, their warm skin was touching. He kissed his shoulder. "God I love you Aaron" he then placed the small glass tumbler filled with dissolve tablets on the bedside table. Moving in could wait for an hour or so. Jackson's priority was Aaron, yes it was only a headache but since all the bad things stopped and life began to settle, a new found sense of protection and security for each other became more prominent.

A few hours later, the glass was empty and Aaron was lying on top of Jackson, their eyes locked on one another, Aaron was trembling, his face red and his body hot, the sweat covered his brow, his neck and trickled down the centre of his chest. Aaron moved backwards then fully lay on Jackson, kissing him forcefully. "Headache's gone then?" Jackson asked between kisses.

Aaron just laughed and nodded, he then rested his head on Jackson's chest, which immediately being cradled in his arm.

It was almost mid-afternoon, the rain was pouring down, it had been all morning and it didn't look like it was stopping anytime soon. Aaron huffed as they carried more boxes over to the house.

"Oh stop winging, we're almost done!" Jackson smirked.

"Yeah and we're getting soaked"

Jacksons smirk grew deeper. "I can see that, and it's fucking hot mmm god Livesy, just you wait till later" he smiled and kissed him quickly on the forehead before they both ran in the house and put down the boxes they were carrying. "Right I'll go get the rest and you can start unpacking stuff, sort the TV out, because I know you're itching to get your x box up and running"

Aaron grinned and nodded. "Oh I am..."

Jackson laughed and headed back out into the horrible weather and ran back to his mums to get the few bin bags of clothes and some utensils she had offered to give them until they had properly sorted.

Aaron set about unpacking mainly Jackson's things. Aaron didn't really have anything apart from his very limited wardrobe and the new x box he bought after the fire, everything else was Jacksons, it got him down a little bit as he unpacked and when Jackson came back he was quiet.

"You alright handsome?" Jackson asked as he walked to him, noting the saddened look on his face and his obvious vibe that he was giving off.

"Mmm..." Aaron mumbled.

"Meaning?"

Aaron shrugged as he put things away.

"Talk to me babe"

Aaron stopped. "It's all your stuff...all of mine has gone, I dunno just..." he sighed.

Jackson sighed and smiled at him as he put his arms around him. "We can start getting you some of your own stuff in here too, this is our home babe, not mine, just don't forget that. You'll get there" he reassured.

Aaron smiled and nodded.

A few hours later, all of Jackson and Aaron's clothes had been put away, side by side in the wardrobe; the furniture had already been in days before, so they didn't have to worry about that. "Yeah no problem, it's fine, I'm on my way" Aaron heard Jackson speaking as he walked back into the living room, he turned to him as he was putting his phone back in his pocket.

"What's up?" Aaron asked as his phone beeped.

"Oh nothing just one of my builder mates needs help on a night shift, I'm sorry babe, I'll stay if you like?" he asked as Aaron checked the text on his phone from Adam. _**I need to talk to you mate it's important**_

"No" Aaron smiled. "You go, I've got plenty to be getting on with and by the looks of it Adam needs a word so I'll probably have some drinks with him, but and I'm being serious for once" and he started waving the remote in his direction in time with each word. "You be careful out there, torrential rain storm...please I mean it"

"Aww your so cute" Jackson grinned as he leaned over the back of the sofa to kiss him.

"Shut up" Aaron frowned and pulled Jackson even closer for a passionate kiss.

"Mmm..." he smiled. "Oh and by the way that shelf you put up in the bedroom" Jackson tried not to laugh. "Well it's as straight as us" he joked. "Next time use a spirit level or just leave it to me"

Aaron laughed. "Charming"

"I know" he grinned. "Right I won't be doing the actual nightshift but I'll get back as soon as I can"

Aaron nodded. "Go on then, sooner you leave, sooner you're back to me"

Jackson smiled, grabbed his keys and left the house.

Aaron was alone now, and the majority of things had been done and put where they wanted them to be. He grabbed a can out of the fridge and put the TV on, he was quite proud he'd set it up without breaking anything. He text Adam back _**Come round mate**_

Ten minutes later there was a knock at the door. "It's open!" Aaron called from the sofa, the door flung open and he could hear the wild wind and the torrential rain bouncing off the ground outside.

"Jesus it's really bad out there" Adam told him as he took off his jacket and hung it up.

Aaron leaned up on his side and turned to face the doorway. "Definitely is, Jackson better be okay" he said as he pulled his legs in closer so Adam could sit down. "Beers in the fridge mate help yourself"

"Why where is he?" Adam asked.

"I dunno, he just had to go help a mate on a job" he told him.

"Ahh" Adam nodded. "Very nice mate, I'm impressed" Adam smiled as he checked the ground floor out; he walked into the kitchen and took out two beer and walked back down sitting next to Aaron. He handed the other can to Aaron.

"So what's up then?" Aaron smiled as he cracked the can open and took a swig.

Adam sighed. "Stupid question but you remember the night in the car?"

"What? When I tried kissing you..." Aaron asked.

Adam nodded.

"What of it?"

"I- I don't know why but lately I've been thinking about it a lot, and the night outs at bar west with you and Jackson..." he sighed and put his hands up to his face and shook his head.

Aaron frowned, this really was important and Adam had his attention. "Just take your time" he placed his hand on Adam's shoulder.

Adam let out a breath and lifted his head up. "Nah, it's stupid, it doesn't matter...you wanna try and whoop my ass on the x box then or what? Seriously" he breathed. "I need the distraction"

Aaron smiled, he was curious and had a slight idea but that would wait until Adam said anything, he wasn't going to force him to talk, instead he smiled and turned it on, and threw him the controller which Adam caught quickly. "Come on then, big man" Aaron teased. "Show me what you got"

"Oh I will!" Adam replied as Aaron sat back down. Adam's gaze on Aaron stayed there for a few seconds before he forced himself to look away to the TV.

A few hours later, they were playing a more relaxed game, a main part of that was because they were drunk and just having a laugh really. Aaron was swaying from side to side without realising and bumped Adam a few times. He squinted his eyes at the TV and his speech was slurred. This however, didn't cause him to lose the race. Adam slammed the remote down, fuming.

Aaron laughed and Adam started to hit him arm gently. "Right I need another..." Aaron said and got up and headed to the kitchen.

Seconds later Adam got up and followed him, Aaron walked back out quickly and stopped directly in front of him before he walked into him.

Aaron immediately felt the atmosphere become heavier. He didn't know about Adam but he was frozen to the spot and they looked at each other, he tried to move out of the way but Adam put his hand on his arm. "Wait...what I was saying earlier, I didn't finish and I should have..." he began explaining as he stepped even closer.

Aaron didn't speak.

"The night you tried to kiss me and I pulled away...well I shouldn't have, ever since then I've being questioning myself and with the night outs it's brought me into a new world if you like..."Adam moved closer as he spoke.

Aaron swallowed hard. There was something in Adams eyes that kept him frozen. "Adam what you doing?" Aaron asked in a whisper.

"What I should have let you do a long time ago, I wanted it all along but I never realised...that's probably why my girlfriends haven't worked out..."

"Adam..." he said as his head was close to him.

With that Aaron felt Adams soft lips on his, he had to admit he'd obviously wanted him at one time in the past but now he had Jackson, how the hell did this all come about? And did he still subconsciously want Adam? Was that his reasoning for not resisting?

He felt Adams hand around his neck, keeping him close as they shared the intimate kiss. It became more passionate and forceful. Adam tasted nice and he was just as a perfect kisser he'd always imagined, and this exchange was turning him on.

Adam pushed Aaron to the sofa as he started to lift his t-shirt up and off him. There wasn't time to even think, Adam lay on top of him topless and Aaron began to lick around his nipples which made Adam groan. Aaron then removed his top and pants quickly as did Adam...

A while later Jackson walked up to the house, he opened the front door and walked in, the door was quiet it never really made a noise. Jackson walked into see Adam lying over Aaron naked, his backside moving up and down in perfect rhythmic thrusts and he heard Aaron's moans and groans each time. His heart sank. He left the house as quietly as he'd entered.

To Be Continued...

I dunno about anyone else but Adam and Aaron, strange? Not to me lol...massive fantasy there so I wanted to write it haha!


	19. 19 Internal Fear

"Internal Fear"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Fulfilled Desires_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

A bright white light shimmered in front of Jackson's eyes when he quietly left the house, heartbroken; all of a sudden he was sat up in bed, his breathing fast and heavy. Aaron was beside him asleep, he hadn't woken up to see the dissolve medicine on the table beside the bed. But Jackson had fallen asleep when he'd come back and climbed in beside him.

Aaron instantly jolted up right. "Hey, whats up?" he soothed, half asleep still, putting his arms around him.

Jackson calmed down. "Promise me you won't leave me please, I love you too much, please don't" he begged and became more and more upset.

"Jackson babe, calm down, I won't I mean it" he smiled. "Did you have a dream or something?" he asked.

Jackson nodded as he breathed. "Yeah, I don't really wanna go over the details again though..." he lay back down.

Several hours later Jackson was sat on the sofa of their new home, after hours of moving their stuff in and re-arranging things to how they wanted it to be. Jackson's dream, nightmare whatever it was, still haunted him, the vivid image of Adam making love to Aaron scared him and he wanted to make sure Aaron was happy with him. That morning Aaron did say he wasn't leaving him, it eased him a lot. He waited for his man to sit down and join him but that wasn't happening it looked like.

Aaron was stood at the other end of the sofa, in deep thought. "Hmm.." he mumbled.

"You okay babe?"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah fine...I just need to go see Paddy for a bit, do you mind?"

"No, I'm just a little concerned that's all, the house..."

"Ahh..." Aaron said. "I know I'll be alright" he smiled as he walked to where Jackson was on the couch and he leaned down and kissed him. "I won't be long"

"Okay" Jackson said with a smile as Aaron left.

The walk to Smithy wasn't usually a long one but today it certainly was. His footsteps were slow and his gaze was on the footpath. He was scared. But Paddy was the only person who came close to being his father and he needed to speak with him, the only problem there was the place in which he lived - the Cottage. To this day Aaron still saw the flames. Everyone thought he was alright, and was mostly over it, but in actual fact he wasn't, and he felt that because he wasn't letting people know his feelings still surrounding that traumatic night, he was letting people down. When Aaron was alone at any time his mind wandered, the sounds of the fire, the feeling of the intense heat came back to him. His scars were there as a reminder that he lived, but he didn't want that, he knew the purpose of that fire, and it failed.

When he approached the house he stopped a few metres before the door and looked at the house, he breathed in quickly then almost jumped when the door opened. "You alright mate?" Paddy smiled.

"Uh..." Aaron frowned. "Yeah sorry, I thought I could..." he swallowed hard. "But I can't...I wanted to talk to you... can we go to the pub or something?"

Paddy nodded. "Of course we can" he smiled. "Nothing to be ashamed of Aaron" he told him. "What you went through in here is unimaginable...I'm just thankful to Jackson that he got it back to a liveable state" he chuckled as he closed the door behind him.

"Yeah well, that's one thing he's certainly good at"

Paddy's jaw dropped. "Aaron!" he laughed.

Aaron pretended to know what his reaction was all about and he shrugged then grinned widely.

Paddy laughed. "Come on then mate...talk away" he smiled. "Must be important...I've hardly seen you since, well the move and the fire..."

"Yeah I'm sorry about that Paddy" he was genuinely apologetic.

"No mate, you don't need to be, as long as you're happy in your home with Jackson that's all that matters" he smiled.

Aaron nodded. "I' am" he replied but his words seemed distant.

Paddy picked up on this. "But...?"

_Just tell him everything you've been thinking _Aaron's thoughts were loud and clear in his mind but he chose not to and just started the conversation he wanted to have with him. "I was by myself sorting out mainly Jackson's stuff and I just thought about you, and I miss that house, the times we had, and I just don't want you to think that you're usefulness has ran out..." he sighed."No I –"

"No I know what you mean" Paddy smiled. "Go on Aaron..."

"So just because I'm not there or see you everyday doesn't mean I still don't need you around, you've done so much for me Paddy" they stopped outside the pub and Aaron looked down to the ground.

Paddy placed his hand on his shoulder and fought back his own emotions.

"No one knows this, whether or not you lot can tell I dunno but..." he looked back up at him with teary eyes. "...I'm a mess..." he breathed and his shoulders relaxed.

"Sit down at the table mate" he spoke warmly and led him to it.

"I knew the fire would still affect you..." Paddy said as they sat face to face.

"And I thought when the police caught Dave that it would go away, but it's not and I don't know what to do..." he turned away as Katie and Gennie left the pub, he didn't want anyone to see him like this.

"Alright?" the two girls asked and Paddy nodded smiling as they walked off. Paddy looked back at Aaron. "Why haven't you told Jackson Aaron?" he asked.

Aaron looked at him and shrugged. "Because he'll get fed up of me, and I don't wanna lose him..."

Paddy shook his head quickly. "Aaron, anyone can see how much that man loves you, you have to talk to him"

Aaron shook his head as he fought back the tears which failed miserably.

Something then dawned on Paddy. "Aaron mate...listen to me...you aren't thinking of doing a repeat of last-"he stopped when Aaron sadly nodded. "Why?" Paddy asked.

"Because that fire was meant to kill me and I shouldn't be here, anyone who's around me gets hurt and I've already done that to Jackson, I don't wanna hurt him anymore, I'm best just out of it gone..." he cried

"No! Aaron that fire was the result of a psycho, who wanted Jackson all to himself, who by the way got out quickly by the looks of it, thank god, and Jackson saved you from the fire, he loves you mate, I keep saying it but don't let go of what you have got, because it's amazing, he's changed you for the better and I'm so proud of you..." he took a breath. "And the fact that you told me must mean you want help before these thoughts get out of control...but first Jackson needs to know" Paddy smiled slightly.

Aaron wiped his eyes and nose as he nodded. "What would I do without you?" he sniffed.

"Oh I dunno..." he smirked. "But I'm always here for you, and what you said before, meant so much" Paddy smiled.

Aaron smiled back at him. "I'll talk to Jackson" he nodded. "He needs to know"

"Good...Come on then...pint..." Paddy said as he stood up from the table. "And I've got some news to tell you..." he added as Aaron got up and started walking into the pub with him.

"Like what?" Aaron asked curiously.

To Be Continued...


	20. 20 The Strength Of Love

"The Strength Of Love"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _Internal Fear_

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

"Oh Paddy come on, tell me!" this was Aaron's fifth attempt at trying to drag this news out of Paddy. He took a big gulp of his lager and sighed, waiting. "Come on you were set to telling me before..."

"Alright...Alright..." he sighed. "It's your mum...when we had to time to think after we brought you back from the hospital, we went to Marlon's and had a drink...and we realised what we had..."

Aaron's eyes widened and he had to double take. His mouth opened slightly. "No..." he said in disbelief. "Seriously? Are you actually telling me you're back with my mum?"

Paddy nodded a slight wary look on his face.

"I dunno why you're looking like that I think its brilliant" Aaron smiled. "But really...I mean it, I'm happy for you both ahh a proper family" he chuckled.

Paddy nodded. "And Carls over there sat in the corner, he doesn't know why she left him so just keep it to yourself for now please?" he asked.

Aaron nodded and placed his finger over his lips. "No worries"

"Thanks mate...right I've gotta get off now..." Paddy finished his pint and stood up. "Remember what I said and talk to Jackson"

"Yes dad" Aaron grinned cheekily.

Paddy smiled and headed off as Adam walked in the pub.

"Alright mate?" he asked. "Haven't seen you in a while, well I saw you moving all the stuff to the new house, hows that working out for ya?" he asked.

"Yeah good cheers mate, go on then I'm parched..." Aaron said as he waved the empty pint glass up to Adam.

Adam rolled his eyes, as he smirked and grabbed the glass from him and he stood at the bar waiting to get served.

While Aaron was waiting, he pulled out his phone and text Jackson: - _**I'll be home soon gorgeous, I've seen Paddy but Adams just come in the pub I'm just gunna have a quick drink with him then I promise I'll make it up to you for being gone so long, I hope you're not mad? I love You – Aaron x**_

Jackson's phone beeped and he pulled it out of his pocket as he lay on the couch watching TV; he read it and immediately got up and pulled on his shoes. An instant panic resounding from the dream overwhelmed him. He locked the door behind him and he ran as fast as he could to the pub, he felt like he could not get there quick enough.

Jackson almost burst through the door but slowed himself down beforehand. He was flustered. _Mmm _Aaron instantly thought. "You alright babe?" he asked as Adam eventually sat back down with the drinks.

Jackson eyed Adam very quickly. "Yeah, I just didn't realise you were here that's all you don't mind if I join you do ya?" he asked.

Aaron instantly shook his head as did Adam "No" Aaron smiled as Jackson sat down beside him, he grabbed a hold of his hand, Jackson smiled gratefully.

"I'll get you a pint mate two seconds" Adam offered and got back up to go to the bar.

"Cheers" Jackson replied and looked at Aaron and took a deep breath, he smiled at him as he moved in closer.

"I need to talk to you later babe, it's important, but nothing to worry about, and I say that because I know you were a bit shaky after that dream this morning, so just to stop you worrying I'm not leaving you" he spoke quietly in his ear and then kissed his cheek softly as he pulled away.

"You ok though?" Jackson mouthed silently as Adam returned and Aaron nodded slightly but still left enough for Jackson to know he was serious. "Thanks mate" he thanked Adam as he sat back in his seat.

"So hows life then guys? C'mon fill me in"

"To be honest mate we've only been in there a day and I've hardly been there..." Aaron replied.

Jackson chuckled. "Yeah hope it's not going to be routine"

Aaron shook his head. "No way, just had some stuff to do that's all" he smiled.

Jackson kept glancing over at Adam, giving him the evils every time he wasn't looking, his dream had really seriously bothered him; but Aaron saw this and nudged his arm rather hard. Adams attention was caught once again.

"What's going on Jackson?" Aaron asked.

"Nothing" he simply replied.

"Doesn't look like nothing, you're sat giving my mate nasty looks"

Jackson sighed.

"Have I done something to upset you Jackson?" Adam asked.

Jackson shook his head and sighed, but more loudly this time. "This is going to sound so stupid..." Jackson smirked.

"Well then what you waiting for? Christmas?" Aaron said.

"Alright alright; that dream I had this morning?"

Aaron nodded.

"Well I dreamt that Adam was fucking you on our couch...and its bothered me all day, even though I know you're not gay...ahh" he was frustrated and put his head in his hands.

Aaron and Adam just looked at each other with smirks on their faces.

"Aww is my boy embarrassed...?" Aaron laughed.

"Oh don't laugh, it's not funny" he actually laughed aswell. "I am so embarrassed" he said as he looked up.

Adam leaned against the table. "Is that your biggest fantasy?" he teased. "But in all seriousness don't worry about it mate, it was only just a dream, and I am straight and even if I weren't he wouldn't be my type I reckon" Adam told him.

Jackson smiled. "Cheers mate"

"So that's why as soon as I mentioned Adam you came straight over?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah...I'm sorry babe, I just kinda panicked, it's really affected me" Jackson really was embarrassed.

"Hey, no I understand, don't be sorry, I'm glad you're here I've missed you"

Jackson smiled. "I missed you too" he said as he squeezed Aaron's hand a little tighter.

A while later; both men walked back into their house, and Aaron grabbed Jackson into his arms and kissed him. "I'm all yours"

Jackson grinned and Aaron could feel it against his lips. "Get upstairs then, christen the bed and all that" Jackson winked then playfully pushed him towards the stairs.

Aaron didn't need telling twice and happily obliged.

A few hours later, they were wrapped in the bed sheets, their legs entangled with each others. They held each other so protectively. r

"So..." Aaron spoke, finally having built up the courage after their love making to start talking about what he'd told Paddy. "I said I needed to talk to you" he said as he ran his fingers through the small hairs on Jackson's chest

"Yeah...I could tell it was important...just take your time babe" Jackson was there for him.

As Aaron concentrated on the circular movements his finger was making on Jackson's chest, he frowned deeply and found this ten times harder than when he told Paddy. "Just let me talk cause it's hard enough, then you can talk" he spoke softly. Jackson stayed silent. "I'm a mess babe; I haven't let anyone know how much of a struggle it's been since the fire, you might have noticed little things but not the full picture, I can't get the flames out of my head" his lip quivered, but he breathed in sharply to stop it. "I can still feel the heat, I should have died that night, I don't deserve to live, I just bring hurt to everyone I love the most and I can't do that to you anymore Jackson, earlier I just wanted to finish it and be gone, but the fact I'm telling you shows that part of me owes it to you to carry on and sort my head out, because what we have is amazing and I don't want to lose this or you, and I'm sorry if what I've said is selfish but I wanna change it..." he kissed the side of Jackson's chest softly. "I'm sorry" he whispered as he allowed the tears to fall, a huge weight had gone; he'd needed to say that for a long time.

It took Jackson a few seconds to reply, partly because he felt so horrible that he didn't read the signs that his man needed him. Aaron lifted his head to look at him and Jackson looked so sad and Aaron dropped his head on his chest. _See? Look what opening your mouth does _He cursed himself.

"I'm so sorry babe...I should have realised..."

"It isn't about realising or not Jackson, that doesn't bother me...what bothers me right now, is the fact that I'm scared you can't deal with me anymore" his voice was muffled.

"Well stop being scared because I'm not going anywhere, I mean it Aaron, no we haven't had it easy, I know your traumatised and I know now the thoughts you've had but you have to stop thinking about those now because you're right we are amazing together and I'd be a broken man if you ever tried killing yourself, you're absolutely everything to me, my whole world, so why would I run?"

Aaron just shook his head without a word.

"I just don't want to become a broken record..."

"You won't and you aren't" Jackson's arm was around Aaron's back and he ran his fingers up and down the middle of it as far as he could reach.

"I hope not..."

"I love you Aaron, I'm going to help you, no matter how long it takes, just keep doing what you did just now" he smiled. "Talking, works wonders you know...I just hope I can help you and that I am enough"

"You're more than enough Jackson, I'm so lucky, when I wake up next to you and when you're making love to me I just can't understand what I did to deserve you, I feel like I have to slap myself to see if it's a dream...when you walk into a room, you give me goose bumps and I've never had that with anyone...not even a girl, back in the day" he chuckled.

Jackson smiled. "You're so brave, braver than you think"

Aaron moved up closer to his face. "No, that's all your influence, I love you Jackson"

Jackson became teary. "I love you too handsome, so much" he smiled as he wrapped his arms around him so tight. His lower lip quivered as he let his tears out fully. "Thankyou for talking to me, it means a lot" Jackson now began sobbing and Aaron tightened his grip around him. "You'll be alright babe, I promise – I promise" Jackson whispered.

The fire had taken something from his boyfriend and Jackson was determined he was going to get it back for him.

To Be Continued...


	21. 21 Battle Of Wills

"The Battle Of Wills"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _The Strength Of Love _

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

Aaron and Jackson walked out of the old building and stood on the steps for a second while Aaron took out a cigarette and lit it, and blew out the smoke with a deep relieved breath.

"C'mon it wasn't that bad babe" Jackson told him.

"Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to talk about stuff like that? She was looking down at me with her counsellor face all stuck up"

Jackson smirked. "No she wasn't" he laughed. "And yes I do know, and I'm proud of you, do you feel any different?"

Aaron frowned and his eyebrows arched. "No"

"Well it was just the first appointment"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah can we get on with enjoying my birthday now though please?"

Jackson grinned like a child. "Oh yes" _He hates surprise parties but tough I wanna see the look on his face _"What do you wanna do?" he asked.

"Umm..." he shrugged. "No idea to be honest babe, a meal or something"

"Alright then, come on" Jackson smiled and put his arm around him as they walked away.

An hour or so later after their oh so posh meal of fish and chips from the chippy they were walking alongside a river and were talking, well Jackson was the one who was mainly talking, Aaron was staring down at the ground and around as they walked hand in hand. Jackson sighed. "And then the monkey jumped off the bed, the sky went purple and the grass went red, oh it was fascinating you should have seen it"

Aaron frowned. "What?" and looked at him.

"Oh so you are listening to me, wow did you see that pig flying?"

Aaron smiled. "Yes I am listening to you, sorry"

"No it's alright, you just haven't acknowledged me since we came down here, I understand though, the counselling will have brought the memories back" Jackson replied and Aaron nodded. "Let's head back then, I need to give you your birthday present, the bag in the van you were so eager to peek into? Yeah that's yours" he smiled lovingly at his boyfriend.

Aaron and Jackson had been back in the village for a few hours now; they sat in the pub talking, it was beginning to get dark outside and the pub was rather quiet, there was still a few of the regulars but other than that it really was strangely quiet.

Jackson's phone beeped. He took it out of his jacket and read the text: - _**We're ready love – Chas x**_

_About time aswell _He thought with a smile.

"What you smiling at?" Aaron asked.

"Just thinking..."

"Of..." Aaron smirked.

"Well that would just be too dirty to say in here but I'll say it like this, birthday boy – treat - bed – pure ecstasy – love"

"Well then" Aaron leaned into him. "Why are we still sat here?"

Jackson smiled and got up with Aaron and they left the pub.

Jackson unlocked the front door giggling as Aaron had his arms around Jackson from behind feeling under his shirt. Jackson pushed the living room door open and turned the lights on.

"SURPRISEE!" came the loud encore from family and friends, party blowers sounded loudly and people set off party poppers, streams of confetti fell out onto the floor. Chas smiled lovingly at him.

Aaron froze and slowly slid his hands out from the hot touch of Jackson's skin. He smiled but was embarrassed at the same time. Jackson turned around and held him tightly, kissing him passionately. "Happy birthday handsome" he smiled.

"Thankyou" Aaron smiled back but gave him a gentle dig in the chest. "But you know I don't like surprises..."

"And since when do I listen to you?" Jackson grinned.

Chas then walked over as the music started playing. "Here get this down you both" she handed the two boys a can of lager each and smiled at Aaron. "Happy birthday love" she said and gave him a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek which Aaron grimaced too. Jackson just smirked finding this highly amusing.

A while later the party was in full swing and Aaron had actually relaxed and got into the spirit of his birthday celebrations, the birthday cards and wrapped presents were piling up on the unit. Jackson was stood with Paddy and Chas leaning against the wall beside the table of food.

Aaron was dancing in the centre of the living room with Adam, he was drunk, Jackson could tell, he couldn't help but laugh as he watched his boyfriend make a complete fool of himself, but Aaron didn't care and that brought an unexpected lump to Jackson's throat. "Thankyou for doing this, I really appreciate your help"

Chas smiled as did Paddy. "You're welcome love, it's just so good to see him having fun and smiling" she smiled as she watched him.

Jackson nodded and breathed heavily as his lip quivered. "Woah excuse me..."

Chas watched him and looked sadly at Paddy before she followed him out through the kitchen, moving through John, Moira, Alicia, David, Leyla, Scarlett, Victoria, Roz, Holly, Hannah and Amy, they were all stood in their own respective groups chatting and having a good time. Chas smiled as she walked through and then out the back door into the garden.

"He'll be alright love..." Chas' voice filled the quietness of the outside.

Jackson turned around as he wiped his eyes. "Just watching him there it was like the old Aaron"

"I know" Chas nodded and walked over to him. "He just needs time I guess, how did the meeting go this morning?"

Jackson sighed. "Difficult; why is he so stubborn?"

"Because he never grew up surrounded by love, I mean, I did...I just wasn't prepared mentally you know and me and Gordon went our separate ways and that was my chance to honestly run" she became upset. "He was a little shit when I did start seeing him again, well, when he actually stayed around me for at least two minutes, even now it's not there one hundred percent fully, but I love him and I'm just so happy he found you" she wiped her tears away.

"Come here" Jackson pulled her into a hug. "He loves you I know he does...at least you're here for him now" he comforted.

Chas nodded as Jackson brought on more tears. "Oh god look at me..." she chuckled as she wiped her eyes carefully again, she could not have that mascara running.

"I'm trying to help him, I really am..." Jackson told her.

Chas nodded. "I know Jackson" she smiled. "The key to Aaron as you should know is patience, if you've mastered that then you're set, says me who actually hasn't" she looked away and let out a breath. "I know its hard love, he can't seem to grasp what's going on in his head and he shuts off and that's when I worry"

Jackson nodded in agreement. "Nothing will happen to him, I'll see to that"

"I know you will" she put her hand on his arm and rubbed it. "Come on, we've got a party to get back too"

Aaron's mood had gone downhill for no reason, the alcohol? He was winding himself more and more up to the anger stage and he needed to get out, he didn't leave but he took himself out of the party environment and walked upstairs. When he pushed the door he saw Roz and Holly giggling as they leaned over a set of drawers, facing away from the door.

Aaron instantly knew what they were doing and he stormed over to them, grabbed Holly's arm and yanked it away sending the white powder that had been obviously carefully lined up with her bank card all over the floor.

"What you doing!" Holly was raging.

"What are you doing more like? Your mum and dad are downstairs for god sake Holly and this is mine and Jackson's bedroom, who the hell said you could come up here! No one, exactly" it was then he saw the medium size bag of white powder in her pocket and grabbed.

"And you" he looked at Roz. "She's your mate and you're getting this stuff for her, you should be ashamed of yourself" he had quickly sobered up.

"Oh don't even go there Aaron, everyone's doing it and you're no good boy, I've heard about what you used to do, Mr Dealer? Hmm" Roz said her piece.

"That's in the past...I learned from my mistakes, I saw what this stuff does to people and its happening now, Jesus Holly you're a wreck"

"Give me my gear back now!" she screamed.

Aaron shook his head. "I'm keeping this and I'm getting rid of it, if you don't leave my house right now I'll go get your mum and dad, explain what I just saw...I'd think very carefully incase you choose the wrong option, I wouldn't mess with me..." he warned.

Holly got up. "This party is boring anyway, I'll get you back for this, I swear to god I will"

"Yeah yeah, and when you actually come off it, you'll thank me..." he knew she would just go and get more he just wasn't having that happen in his and Jackson's house. Aaron's party mood was shot. He grabbed a fresh pack of cigarettes from his drawer and walked down the stairs and just left. He couldn't be done with all the happiness. What was the point in it?

Aaron found himself sitting at the seat by the telephone box, he was smoking his cigarette. The anger inside him confused him; obviously he was majorly pissed off because of what Holly and Roz were just doing but this anger was nothing new it just manifested in different ways at different times.

Aaron was hunched down, his elbows on his legs. He was flicking the lighter and looked at the flame. He let it disappear then lit it again, staring all the while. He moved slightly and he heard something fall onto the seat from his pocket as he cut out the flame. He looked down and saw the pouch of drugs. He frowned angrily and shook his head. He lit the lighter again and stared. Aaron picked up the bag without looking at it until it was within his view. He straightened his back as he felt the powdery content through the bag. His eyebrows rose as he looked around, the village was quiet but nevertheless this was not something he could do in view of anyone who might see...he got up and walked away.

To Be Continued...


	22. 22 At Wits End

"At Wits End"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows on from _The Battle Of Wills _

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

NOTE: Please bare with me, with this chapter, there was a break almost halfway through, so I do apologise if it drifts off or seems all over the place. Thanks guys! Reviews welcome and Enjoy!

Aaron's arms rested over the top of the railing and then his head leaned over it quickly and seconds later he projectile vomited. His throat spasmed and his neck jerked as he was being sick. The now empty bag of drugs dropped out of his hands and was carried along the wind until it hit the river below him.

Aaron was standing on the bridge; he had emptied the heroine into the river before crossing the bridge, he wasn't going to lie; he was tempted – a hell of a lot but Jackson came to mind. How could he do that? Yet another problem, a cause for concern, and heartache to the man he loved.

Truth is, he couldn't and he wouldn't do that to him, Aaron began making his way back to the house, proud of what he'd just prevented himself from becoming which in all honesty would have been a monster. He did not allow it to lure him.

Jackson walked up to Chas with his hands in his pockets wearing a rather concerned look on his face. "Have you seen Aaron?" he asked loudly over the music and enjoyment of the guests.

"No, love, why?" Chas asked with a shake of her head.

"I can't find him" Jackson shrugged his shoulders. "Anywhere"

"I'm sure he'll be alright" Chas smiled which was just returned by a very blank look from Jackson. "I know, I know..." she sighed. "We have to try getting out of the habit of panicking every time he disappears somewhere" Chas added.

Jackson sighed, he knew she was right. "What reason is there to go disappearing?"

Chas shook her head but stopped quickly. "Oh, see...look, you can stop worrying now" she smiled and rubbed his arm.

Jackson turned around to see Aaron closing the front door – he walked over to him. "Where you been?" he asked. "I got worried"

"I just needed some air, drank too much"

"Ah ok, I would have came with you" Jackson replied.

"Well I didn't wanna drag you away and plus I can look after myself"

"Yeah that's what's worries me babe" Jackson sighed with a smile.

The sun bleated through the living room window, Aaron and Paddy stood side by side in front of the fireplace with their arms folded, looking down at Jackson and Chas cuddled up together on the couch. Aaron smirked and shook his head and grabbed the black bin bag up from his feet and carried on tidying up, making as much noise as he possibly could, and Paddy was actually amused by what he was doing. Paddy sniggered to himself as he tidied the living room – the place wasn't terribly bad, just a lot of glasses, bottles and paper plates lying around, there was also dried spillages on the wood flooring.

Aaron sighed as he saw it. _I'll do it later_ he thought to himself.

As Paddy fired up the hoover Chas jumped up dazed, and hit Jackson on his jaw with her head as she moved quickly. She hadn't even realised she'd done it but he was now awake aswell.

"Uhhh...oh god...I'm dying" Chas complained as she stumbled to the kitchen.

Aaron was really quiet when she walked in, she squinted as she leaned against the kitchen bench, and the light was too much for her to handle right now. "Morning love"

Aaron nodded; he wasn't facing the doorway where Jackson was stood. Jackson gave a look to Chas to which she shrugged. "Right I'll be off love, I'll come round later" she smiled and left them too it, taking Paddy with her. He'd helped quite a bit with the cleaning but work still needed doing.

Jackson rubbed his jaw. "You alright?" he asked. "You're quiet?"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah...I need to tell you something" he said sheepishly.

Jackson frowned. "Oh babe, can it wait? Please, just a while..." his response fuelled by his fragile state.

Aaron panicked, while he was alone in the kitchen tidying, he'd actually found the courage to talk to him, waiting was out of the question. He shook his head quickly. "No...If I don't say it now, then I won't...and I just wanna be honest with you"

Jackson looked at him properly now, and saw the panic in his eyes. Obviously his mind began thinking of the worst case scenario, he was going to be dumped, he cheated, and all kinds ran through his head in those few seconds. "Alright...go on..." His eyebrows edged inwards as he concentrated.

"I found Holly and Roz taking drugs in our room last night; I went mental, threw them out and took their drugs off them..."

"Okay..." Jackson closed his eyes for an instant as he spoke slowly, trying to figure out where this was going.

"When I went out last night, they fell out of my pocket and I nearly snorted the lot..." Aaron saw Jackson tense up and his expression change with anger and frustration. "No...Please babe, listen..." Aaron sighed and moved towards him.

"Don't touch me Aaron! I'm fucking fuming at you right now!"

Aaron instantly scowled at him. "What? Why for being honest? Or you fuming that I didn't do it?" he wondered.

"Helloooo?" their first domestic in their house was disrupted by the sound of Pearl.

Both men were stood glaring at each other.

"I thought you boys would be hungry...I've seen the takeaway boxes piled up in the bin...so I- oh I'm sorry have I come at a bad time?"

Jackson instantly smiled at her, he got on with Pearl a lot, he liked their playful chat. "Nooo, of course not!" he grinned and invited her in.

"Oh this place has probably seen better days" she commented. "Look at the state of it"

Jackson chuckled. "It's alright, we're tidying up, was Aaron's birthday yesterday" he told her.

"Ohh yes, you know, my memory these days" she sighed; as she smiled at Aaron, she knew straight away he wasn't happy.

Jackson led her into the kitchen but as he did he leaned into Aaron's ear and whispered. "If you think that; then you have no idea how much I care about you, sort it Aaron, getting sick of it now" he told him harshly before walking into the kitchen.

Aaron was tempered. He'd already changed, freshened up – he was good to go. As he walked to the door he heard Pearl. "I brought you some lemon cake"

"Ohhh" Jackson sounded happily with a grin. "You know I love that..."

The front door slammed shut.

Aaron was sat at the bar talking to his mum who was working, he took a sip of his pint and shook his head, the pub was quiet. "You were honest love, yeah I'm not happy you came to that point of having to think twice about it but something stopped you"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah" he said as the door opened and Jackson walked in, Chas was straight round the bar walking to him.

"Get over there a sec" she told him

Jackson rolled his eyes and walked to a seat in the far corner and sat down. "He told you then?"

Chas nodded. "Yeah, and I'm not happy either Jackson, but telling him to sort it, and that you're getting sick of it now does NOT help him"

"Yeah ok, but can you blame me, I don't know how to HELP him, it's one thing after another and there's only so much patience a man can have, even me but he's pushing it"

"You? But you're so calm, well that's what it seems..." Chas noted.

Jackson nodded, eyeing Aaron watching them. "Yeah I 'am but like I said, only so far I can be pushed. It's just one thing after another with HIM"

"Don't talk about Aaron like that" she was blunt and defensive.

"No hang on, why are you having a go at me Chas? He's the one who looked at the drugs and thought hmmm do I or don't I...no I know he didn't but that's not really the point what bothers me is the fact he must have wanted too"

"I'm having a go Jackson because of our conversation last night...you said you'd help him, and that you'd not let anything happen to him"

Jackson nodded. "Yeah I did, beginning to wonder what the point is now..."

Aaron stormed over. "I can't take this anymore, you two sitting here talking about me like this, look Jackson, I'm sorry alright, I just thought you'd appreciate honesty, I love you enough to be honest"

"And what if you'd taken the drugs Aaron? Would I have even crossed your mind?" Jackson asked.

"BUT I DIDN'T!" Aaron was angry and furious. He didn't take it, he was honest, and there was no big deal now, well to him anyway.

"He's got a point Jackson..." Chas added quietly. "We don't really need to ask why he was tempted, I think we all know, but you do need to stop being so stupid" she stood up looking at Aaron, and gave him a supportive smile and walked back round to the bar.

"What stopped you then?" Jackson asked outright.

"You did" Aaron lowered his head. "Because it may come as a surprise but I do love you, I couldn't have hurt you like that, do you think I like being like this?"

"No I know you don't that's what the counsellor is for, because I can't obviously help you can I?"

Aaron hid the tears as he shook his head. "Don't think anyone can" he said quietly.

Jackson could see he was upset and it upset him seeing it. "I'm sorry for what I said, please don't cry...we'll keep the counselling sessions going for you, but promise to listen next time and pay attention to what she says because..." he sighed. "Some small insignificant word to me might mean a thousand words to you"

Aaron nodded. "Alright I will, just don't leave me Jackson..." he spoke sadly.

Jackson shook his head as he stood up. "I won't, I'm getting out of here, I just wanted to talk to you"

"Alright..."Aaron felt awkward now and stood uncomfortably.

Jackson looked at him. "See ya later" he sighed and lowered his head as he walked out of the pub.

Chas watched from the bar. "Men..." she mumbled.

Aaron walked back to his stool and rested his elbow on the bar and rested his chin on his fist. "Gimme a pint mum, please"

"Why haven't you gone with him?"

"I'm sorry...but I'm sure I felt the atmosphere a second ago...its best I stay out of his way for the rest of the day."

Chas sighed. "And that's really gunna help isn't it?"

"Do you know what, if you haven't got anything useful to say to me then just button it alright" he sighed.

Seconds later she slammed his pint down onto the bar.

To Be Continued...


	23. 23 Parental Guidance

"Parental Guidance"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows _**directly **_on from _At Wits End _

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

The pub was still quiet, Chas was stood at the very back of the bar with her arms folded watching her son drink yet another pint of lager. She sighed and shook her head and without a thought she walked to the front of the bar, grabbed his half full pint and poured it down the sink behind the bar. Aaron looked up, shocked frowning at her. "What you doing? I paid for that!"

Chas chuckled slightly. "No you didn't, I did, and the one before that, and the one before, get in the back, NOW!"

Aaron didn't move.

"NOW! Aaron!" she raised her voice more loudly this time.

Aaron rolled his eyes and got off the stool and walked around the bar and through the door to the back, once out of sight she pushed him into the living room.

Aaron turned around instantly.

"Don't you dare even look at me like that kid! Do you have any idea what you're doing to people? Hmm..." Chas demanded and Aaron didn't reply. "No you wouldn't would ya? Because all you care about is yourself! And I'm sorry love but things need to be said, you're tearing Jackson apart – all he's ever done is be there for you, to try and help you"

Aaron scoffed and looked away, his hands at his waist, his head shaking in aggravation. "Yeah...because he really helped me when his psycho ex set me on fire didn't he? I mean, calling the police just a tad too late, really helps! THIS IS HIS FAULT, yeah I say it's fine but actually no it's not fine mum! He could have stopped this and I'm fucking messed up!"

Chas' back straightened. "I can see that, that's what counsellor's are for"

"Oh don't you start aswell, I mean since when have you give a damn about me!"

Chas' face filled with rage and with one quick movement she slapped him hard across the face. Aaron's face moved to the side and he placed his hand over his stinging cheek. His breathing fast from the anger within.

Jackson's suitcase was laid open on his and Aaron's bed; he wiped his eyes as he placed a pile of folded clothes inside it. Hazel stood in the doorway of the room, watching unbeknownst to her son; her arms folded.

"Oh no you don't" she startled him as she walked in quickly and started taking out the clothes he had placed inside.

"Leave me alone mum, yeah?" he asked.

Hazel shook her head. "No, from our conversation ten minutes ago you told me you told him you wouldn't leave him"

"Yeah...I know, but he's not gunna change...he's proved it..." he placed more inside the case to which Hazel immediately took back out again.

"What so, you're just going to walk away? And never look back, what will THAT do to Aaron?" Hazel asked.

Jackson shrugged.

"No, I'm not accepting that Jackson, this is NOT you..." she sighed. "Do you know what, you boys need your heads banging together, and you really do" she told him, she reached for his arm gently and stopped him.

Jackson stood still.

"Sit down darling" she persuaded and he did calmly. "Now I need you to listen to me son because what you choose to do here today will change things either way...just listen for a sec..." she said as she saw Jackson becoming irritated. "Now I know the fact that Aaron had to think twice about taking the drugs is bothering you"

"It's not just that mum" he put his elbows onto his legs and his head in his hands when he leaned down.

"I know, just listen...but for a minute put yourself in his shoes...the house he lived in was set on fire, with him in it, he's not only scarred physically but mentally aswell, he tried to jump into the lake when you were away, his heads messed up as you well know, but it was messed up before you came along, Aaron is complex, there's so many different shades to him, that's why you love him I can see that, but how would you feel? Having all that happen to you? I'll tell ya...angry, hurt, lacking in confidence, scared, frustrated but the main one in my opinion he's lost his self"

Jackson nodded as he cried silently.

"I know you have the patience of a saint at times, and I know it's wearing you down all of this but please don't make any rash decisions when you're in a state like this, because trust me son" she sighed. "You'll live to regret it, that boy loves you, it's plain to see, and you love him, now unpack your stuff right now, chill out. Please Jackson; you'll thank me one day"

Jackson sighed and just leaned into his mother for a hug.

The room was silent; the atmosphere could be sliced with a knife. "You didn't mean that Aaron, and you certainly didn't mean that about Jackson!" Chas tried to get through to him.

Aaron didn't say a word, only simply shook his head.

Chas nodded and relaxed. "You need to talk to me love...so whether you like it or not, this is getting sorted now, I'm listening, I'm not going anywhere"

Aaron shrugged and his eyes started to fill. "I don't know where to start...I'm just angry all the time...more than normal..." he rolled his eyes. "I'm scared, I feel claustrophobic, too much information but when Jackson goes to touch me I let him but I hesitate and I panic...the scars are there mum and I can't forget it...that's why I wanted to die, I didn't tell you but when I was away with Jackson, he had to talk me away from the edge of the piers they have in the lakes, I wanted to jump in, I know I'm an idiot" he sighed and sat down next to his mum.

"You've gotta get past this son, the fire happened for a reason and if you think about it positively it brought you and Jackson together permanently by moving in" she explained and took his hand.

Aaron struggled to stop the tears and he looked into her eyes. "Do you think he hates me?"

Chas almost faltered at the sight of her son before her, trying to readjust to life again. Her lips quivered but she smiled a little and placed her hand on his cheek and with her thumb wiped away his tears. She shook her head. "No, he's just stressed Aaron, we all care about you, we love you, stop wanting to hurt yourself because it hurts US in the end, just let it go love, the fire and everything else is in the past, Jacksons the best thing to happen to you in a long time, stop pushing him" she spoke supportively but also as a mother should, giving advice because at the end of the day parents knew what was best, deep down.

Aaron wiped his again eyes and Chas pulled him into a hug, a tight one at that, and she cried too, with him. There was a knock on the living room door a minute or so later. Chas turned and looked at the door and saw Jackson peeking in. Aaron hadn't looked up, he was resting his head on her shoulder, thinking.

Chas moved her head and motioned him in, smiling at him. Jackson smiled back and walked to his boyfriend and knelt down in front of him and looked up into his glazed, teary blue eyes and smiled a little."Come here babe, I'm sorry" he told him and held out his arms.

Aaron literally jumped into his arms and held him tight. "I'm sorry too" he whispered.

Chas got up and made a discreet move to the door; she stopped and watched them she had a good feeling this time. Things would really get better from here on in. Chas left quietly and went back to work.

To Be Continued


	24. 24 Back At One

"Back At One"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows _**1 month **_on from _Parental Guidance _

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

The table had one tall candle in the centre; the atmosphere was friendly, the room warm and cosy. Aaron sat opposite Jackson on their table for two; they held hands from across the table. The restaurant was quite busy but relaxing enough.

"So then Mr Livesy, why are we here?" Jackson smirked. He knew why, he just didn't think Aaron would remember in the slightest. He wanted him to say it.

Aaron returned his smirk. "I happen to recall one year ago, to this exact day you pulling me away from attacking Carl in the village" Aaron rolled his eyes. Oh how he's changed.

Jackson beamed with happiness as he nodded. "You remembered"

Aaron flicked his head to one side and clicked his tongue, a look on his face which read 'Duhh, obviously'

Jackson chuckled. "You just keep on surprising me..."

Aaron smiled and picked up his pint while retaining his gaze on Jackson. "So how was the meeting this morning then? Seen as though you just left me lying there..." he rolled his eyes and smirked as he leaned onto the table, with folded arms.

"Well you are irresistible but...business is business..." Jackson said as he sat back.

"I know babe"

"Yeah it was alright, no actually better than good absolutely fantastic...signed on the dotted line, got the contract for three years..."

Aaron smiled. "Ahh that's great babe, I'm really pleased for you...I was paying attention" he smirked. "I swear...what you building again?" he asked.

Jackson laughed and shook his head a little. "Five star state of the art cottages around the dales, some together, maybe one dotted around...Declan's been great"

Aaron smiled and raised his glass. "Let's toast then..."

Jackson raised his too, he smiled. There was so much of good change in Aaron, it was quite difficult to actually get used to it, but he liked his change all the same.

"To the future" Aaron said with a smile.

"To the future" Jackson repeated and both men leaned over the table and passionately kissed for a few seconds causing the other customers to turn their attention to them, giving them looks and talking about them. Aaron realised this once he'd sat down.

"Babe...no..." Jackson spoke quietly in warning; he could see Aaron's anger.

Aaron scowled at him and stood up, drawing even more attention to himself. "You all got a problem? Hmm?" he asked, all eyes were on him. "You all kiss people you love don't ya?" he frowned cockily. "Well I happen to love this man" he spoke confidently and proudly as he pointed down to Jackson, who was up to now panicking but now was looking up at him lovingly. "And I'm going to kiss him, wherever and whenever I want, so if you don't like it, not our problem, do one"

Aaron sat back down; he took a breath and looked puzzled. _Did I actually, just do that? _He thought and then picked up his pint and took a sip.

Jackson watched him, smiling. "I love you too Aaron"

Aaron smiled back. "Come on then...your presents waiting at home...and it's not dirty..." he stood.

Jackson looked a little shocked. "Excuse me?" he laughed as he stood up too.

"Well maybe if you play your cards right there might be some dessert waiting..." Aaron winked.

Jackson bit his lip. "Such - a – tease" he pronounced each word prominently

"I know" he grinned smugly as they made their way to the counter to pay.

As they walked out, Jackson slapped Aaron's backside playfully to the chagrin of an older lady. Jackson saw her straight away; grinned and winked at her which annoyed her even more.

Aaron couldn't hold the laugh in any longer and let it out as he started to walk along the footpath.

Jackson and Aaron crossed the road after getting off the bus and started walking down into the village; hand in hand. "It was nice tonight, not having to take the van so I could actually have a drink for once" Jackson smiled.

"Well I know it's not much but you deserved too" he said as a figure in the dark caught his eye, a few doors up from Hazel's house.

"So, what have you gotten me then?" Jackson asked. "Come on...you know you've been dying to tell me all night" he smirked.

"Shh" Aaron instantly sounded. Jackson silenced and looked at Aaron, and followed his eye line.

"That doesn't look normal..." Jackson whispered.

"Damn right it doesn't...Their checking the place out" Aaron told him.

Jackson frowned. "How do you know?"

And all it took was a look. "Trust me"

"Ahh..." Jackson got it as Aaron started to move ahead quickly but quietly.

"Aaron!" he whispered with urgency.

Aaron waved his arm behind, shooing him back.

Jackson sighed, he let him go, and he trusted him with this, even though he didn't like it.

Aaron had managed to stay quiet all the way to the open gate where the burglar was looking in through the window. He had to be quick now and with a swift movement he ran into the small garden area and grabbed the thief from behind "Got'cha!" he said loudly as he pulled him away with force, throwing him to the ground outside on the path. The thief struggled to get away from Aaron's grip, the next thing he felt was his fist ploughing into his face.

Jackson darted down the road. "Aaron, let him go...I think he got the idea"

Aaron looked up, stopping for a second. "Really? I don't think so...no one comes to this village and does what he was planning...you'll think twice now won't ya?" he asked, the thief nodded.

"You sure?" Aaron asked and punched him hard again. "You are now; get the hell out of here" he raged.

The thief hadn't moved so fast in his life and he ran away up the road, heading out of Emmerdale.

The TV was on quietly in the background, which was the only light lighting the room. Aaron was sat forward on the sofa, watching some late news program while Jackson held a bag of frozen peas over his fist. "You're crazy" Jackson said quietly as he leaned over and kissed his neck. Aaron turned smiling and his lips found Jacksons and they locked in an embrace until they were out of breath.

"I know" Aaron smiled. "Oh and your gift, Mister, has been staring you in the face all day...that letter on the mantel piece..."

Jackson was intrigued and he pushed himself up off the sofa. "I bet you're joking...it's bloody council tax innit?"

"Oh shut up sexy and open it"

Jackson nodded and picked the letter up and immediately saw the logo. 'Euro star' as the header on the letter. "No..."

Aaron nodded, smiling as he lay back on the sofa watching him. "Yeahhh..."

He watched as Jackson read the letter and eventually pulled the tickets out. "Like it?" he asked.

"Like? I love it, awww thankyou handsome; I've always wanted to go to Paris"

"Well now you are, with me...come here"

Jackson lay over his man and kissed him. "Looks like we're in for a long night Livesy..."

"Hmmm...Got plans..." Aaron joked.

"Oh? Doing?" Jackson smirked, as he moved his head closer to Aaron's.

"You" Aaron replied seriously and put his hand on Jackson's neck and pulled him down...

To Be Continued...


	25. 25 This Isn't Goodbye

"This Isn't Goodbye"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows _**2 days **_on from _Back At One _

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

NOTE: This is my last chapter in this series of fanfic; some may not like how it has ended, I apologise. I hope you guys stick around though? There'll be more. Thanks for reading, reviews welcome as always. This chapter will take place over a few days.

"Do you want to take the job or not?" Cain asked. "I can't keep waiting Aaron – he needs an answer ASAP, he needs a good mechanic out there and you're it, it's up to you, just think about it yeah?"

_**Saturday – 11.30am**_

Aaron remembered Cain's words. He sighed. Australia? Very far away from everything he'd ever known. This life changing offer had also brought along with it massive problems, did he want to leave? Jackson couldn't go because of the contract, unless of course he forgot that and went with him anyway, and then the question of would he leave Jackson? Came around...well that was no straight away but deep down, still he'd wanted to get away for a long time. His life with Jackson was perfect but on the other hand he needed to concentrate on himself. But there was one person left to speak too before he spoke to Jackson.

It was Saturday morning, Aaron was laying awake, thinking as he looked at Jackson who was sleeping peacefully. His eyes filled up as he sat up slowly and got out of bed. He grabbed some clothes and got dressed, within a few minutes he was writing a note: - _**At the pub, need to speak to mum x**_

_**11.55am**_

Aaron walked into the heaving pub. _Woah..._he thought. One of Declan's organised shooting parties for his snobby friends it looked like. Aaron frowned as he made his way to the bar.

"Oh love! Thank god you're here...get behind here now..."

"Oh mum c'mon..."

"Now Aaron" she said as she was pulling a pint. "Alicia's late, she'll be here soon, Diane's away and Marlon's off for the weekend and Moira's not in till later...so now, come on it's not hard!"

"Hmmm...alright then..." he agreed and walked behind the bar and started serving.

_**12.30pm**_

Alicia had arrived to work, typically as it started to calm down. Aaron had worked up quite a sweat and had his sleeves rolled up with a tea towel over his shoulder. Chas smirked as she leaned against the doorway going into the back. "You really do look the part...not as bad as you think is it?"

"Err...no not really..." he half smiled.

"Hmm...Ok son...what's up?"

Aaron rubbed his brow with his thumb and his index finger, and then looked back at her. "I need to talk to you...its really important"

Those words hit Chas like a ton of bricks and the lump in her throat was immediate. She coughed to try and clear it. "In the back love" she smiled. They had become so close; she never thought she'd see the day. Chas followed him in and wiped away the tears that were on the brink of falling.

"Ohh this must be important, you'll wear out the floor with all the pacing you're doing..." she was nervous.

Aaron stopped pacing. "Has Cain said anything to you...?" he asked.

Chas looked puzzled. "What about?" she asked.

"Makes a change..." he smiled and sat on the sofa.

"Come on love you're killing me here..." she said as she joined him. "You're ok aren't you? Jackson?"

"Yeah, yeah...we're fine..." Aaron took a deep breath. "I've been given the opportunity of a lifetime, to go to Australia and work over there, but I needed to talk to you before Jackson, I'm confused...I need to concentrate on me"

Chas nodded in agreement.

"I love him, I do...but I don't think he'll be able to go with the contract he signed with Declan...this **wasn't planned** mum...he's gunna hate me, but why shouldn't I do this? I need a damn good reason for me not to go"

Chas sighed. "I don't begrudge anyone of a fresh start, a change even son but the big question here is Jackson, you yourself know you need to talk to him, maybe it'll work out, I've never experienced long distance relationships but you and Jackson are strong love it could work, try not to think negative towards it all, it might work out okay..."

"I thought the same, when I was lying in bed watching him...when I got up the tears started..."

"Whoa...hang on tears?"

Aaron nodded.

Chas sighed heavily. "Well seems to me you've already made your mind up, you wouldn't have gotten upset otherwise...I know you love Jackson, and I'm gunna feel horrible for saying this because I love him too but you're my son and I have to be honest with you..." she took his hands in hers and looked at him properly. "You have to do what is right – what is best for you"

Aaron nodded with a quivering lip and was simply pulled in for a tight hug by his mum. Her tears fell now.

**1.15pm**

Aaron placed his two empty pint glasses on the bar and his mother gave him a questioning look. Aaron nodded. "Good luck love" she smiled.

Aaron walked back into the house and Jackson was in the kitchen. "Hey babe" Jackson said. "You ok?"

Aaron nodded. "Sit down a minute please? Need to talk to you"

"Sure" Jackson frowned as he dried his hands.

They both walked into the living room and sat on the sofa facing each other. "What's this about Aaron?" Jackson asked nervously.

Aaron sighed. "I've had a job offer..."

"Oh..." Jackson perked up.

"Yeah...don't get too happy about it though Jackson...seriously"

Jackson frowned. "Why not? Surely it's an upgrade, one of those posh places in town..."

Aaron stood up and walked over to the fireplace and stood facing away from Jackson. He'd gotten this far to telling him, there was no way he could change the subject now. He shook his head. "No...Other side of the world...Sydney..." he sighed.

"What the? How? When? How long?" Jackson just fired questions at him in complete shock.

Aaron sighed. "Monday, if I decide to go, one of Cain's contacts needs a mechanic out there, he asked me, and how long?" Aaron shook his head. "No idea, a year or two maybe"

"You're not are ya? You can't and I can't come..." Jackson's heart broke, Aaron didn't have to say anything, he knew what was coming.

"Is there any way you could?" Aaron asked quietly.

Jackson shook his head.

Aaron dropped his and the tears fell. "I love you Jackson, I really do..."

"Then why are you doing this?" Jackson frowned angrily.

"I NEED to do this, it's simple, I can't keep kidding myself or you that I'm getting over whats happened because I'm not, everything is a constant reminder of all the bad things that's happened in my life, if i don't do this now then I'll forever be living in a nightmare, you're the only good thing about this place, about me...it could work...we can get webcams, talk all the time"

"Time difference is a bit of a problem" Jackson snapped then he realised. "You stopped going didn't you?"

"My choice Jackson, wasn't doing a thing...and obviously we'd have to compromise Jackson" Aaron was sad, he knew this would happen but wasn't quite prepared.

"Oh yeah!" Jackson laughed. "Like you are?" He would bring up the counselling again later, he was NOT happy about that.

Aaron sighed. "This isn't an easy decision you know"

"Obviously it was, because you've decided already I can tell"

"You're my life Jackson, the reason I get up on a morning, if it wasn't for you I wouldn't even be alive right now, you've saved me from so many things, do you really think I'd give up on us now, it's been breaking my heart the last few days, I didn't know how to tell ya"

Jackson shook his head and turned it away. Crying. "You should have tried harder Aaron, the reason you're going is because you're still a mess, as far as I knew, you were still going to the sessions, things were looking up for us, I'm not a psychic...no sorry, I know you wouldn't forget but at least to the point of where it doesn't affect you" Jackson stood up, grabbed the Paris tickets and held them in frustration until he raised them up and tore it into small bits much to Aaron's shock. "You wanna go to Australia? Fucking go then! This is us!" he flung the teared up pieces of card and envelope at Aaron and they fell to the floor, shattered, a mere form of what they previously were. Jackson turned quickly and stormed out.

"Jackson!" he called after him, crying. "It doesn't have to be like this!"

_**Saturday 11.30pm **_

The door slammed shut and footsteps ran up the stairs. Aaron was in the bedroom with his bag laid out on the bed, half full of all of his clothes and a few photographs. Jackson burst into the room and grabbed the piles of clothes out of his bag and walked to put them back. Aaron grabbed him. "What the hell are you doing, you haven't given a toss since I told ya? Why you bothering now?"

Jackson's eyes were red and glazed; it was obvious he'd been crying. "You're not leaving Aaron"

"Yes I' am, my career is on the up, I don't wanna be a mechanic in a tiny village for the rest of my life, and I just need to get away from this place" he said with frustration as he threw the clothes back into his bag. "Nothing helps, what the counsellor says, what you say, what my mum says...Paddy, Adam...NOTHING...I need to do it my way, please Jackson, just let me do it my way, I'm not doing this to hurt you or tear us apart, I love you for god sake...I still wanna be with you, so much"

"How can you be with me from the other side of the world Aaron?" he yelled. "You can't kiss me, you can't touch me Aaron, how is THAT being with me? Might aswell be on another planet" he raged.

"What part of I love you, don't you understand?" Aaron asked.

"Love me? Yeah right..."

Aaron scowled and pushed him up against the wall, pinning him up by his arms and forcefully kissed him...

_**Sunday 2.00pm**_

Adam found Aaron at the cricket pavilion; he walked up to him with a slight smile and joined him on the steps. "Your mum told me, so you don't need to explain, I'm happy for ya mate"

Aaron smiled and looked at his best friend. "I'm glad someone is"

"Jack-" Adam didn't get to finish.

"Jackson isn't speaking to me at all..."

"Ahh he'll come round, he's stubborn like you, and it's not like you're gunna be gone forever..."

A thoughtful silence came over them. "I'll miss ya mate" Aaron spoke quietly.

Adam placed his arm around his shoulders. "Me too" he smiled.

"Thanks for always being there...and you know what I mean" Aaron smiled with teary eyes.

Adam knew what he meant and nodded. "It's alright...Don't get soppy on me now mate" he chuckled. "Ahhh come here" he pulled his friend into a hug. "Be safe out there right?"

Aaron nodded and returned his hug. He was pleased he got this chance alone, because it wouldn't happen when he was leaving, not in front of everyone.

_**Monday 10am**_

Aaron was showered and dressed, his bags were in the living room, and everyone was downstairs except him and Jackson. "I hope that one day you'll forgive me Jackson, just please and try and understand. I've gotta go now...I love you so much, whether you wanna believe that or not I do...bye babe" he smiled as he took one last look at him. Then he broke down as he left the room and walked back down the stairs, walking into the room and immediately being pulled into a hug by his mum, who was really upset aswell.

"He hates me..."

"We'll look after him Aaron..." Chas said and then opened the front door. "Taxi's here..."

"This is me then..." he smiled as he looked at Paddy, his mum, Adam and Hazel.

He walked out the door and they followed him. He handed his bag to the taxi driver who put them in the boot.

"Oh come here you" Chas said again. "You need to call me as soon as you get there no excuses, and then at least twice a week afterwards, I mean it, you're my boy and I need to know you're ok"

Aaron nodded. "I will"

Hazel walked over to him. "Jackson will come round Aaron, like your mum said, we'll look after him" she smiled and hugged him. "Put yourself right love" she whispered. They pulled away and Aaron was so choked he could not speak, just simply nodded.

Adam didn't say a word either; he just smiled at him and gave him a slight nod.

Paddy stepped closer. "Take care of yourself...son" tears fell from his eyes and Aaron quickly flung himself into his arms.

"Thankyou for everything"

"Always Aaron" Paddy whispered.

Chas was uncontrollable now; her hand covered her mouth as she sobbed.

Aaron stepped away from them all. "I'll see you soon" he smiled.

Jackson ran out of the front door. "No, wait..."he walked right up to Aaron. "Please don't go babe"

"I've got too Jackson" Aaron shrugged. "We had a good run didn't we?" he cried more at those words and rested his head on Jackson's chest. "Please forgive me..."

"This isn't goodbye" Jackson lifted Aaron's head up. "I love you, with all my heart"

"I love you too, and I'm sorry..."

Jackson leaned closer and kissed him with such passion that even the others felt it. The kiss ceased and both men looked at each other. "I'll be here when you're ready" Jackson cried silently as he spoke those words.

Aaron nodded as he cried, he stepped away and took what would be his final glance at his family and friends for a while and smiled. "Don't cry mum..."

That obviously didn't help and she cried more wrapped in Paddy's arms, a sight Aaron had wanted to see again for a long time. He took a final look around the village, sighed with mixed feelings and opened the door to the taxi and got inside.

It began to drive away and Aaron looked out of the back window as tears streamed down his face.

All of them stayed there until the taxi was no longer in view. They were going to miss him so, so much. To the point it hurt, for one in particular; Jackson.


End file.
